Eulogy I read for Brad

I stand here today doing something that I thought I never expected to be doing in my lifetime. Giving a Eulogy for my little brother.

Today is a day for us all to celebrate his life with his family and friends and remember the man, father and local businessman.

Bradley Potter ..known to his family and friends as "little bear"

That later changed to "canoe head"

Let me take a moment to tell you about this man, this brother, and this dedicated father.

Let me share with you how my little brother turned into man.

Life began for Bradley December 1,1971 in Rocky Mountain House Alberta. The youngest of 5 kids born into the Potter family. Ernie and Shirley Potter welcomed their bundle of joy into the family and from the day one that kid was the "baby".

As many of you may know, being the baby of the family, Bradley got the treatment reserved for the youngest, by both Ernie and Shirley. Bradley got his mother's attention and love and his father's patience and zest for building things.

Growing up with young Bradley was a pleasure and a HUGE pain in the ass for us older kids, as it should be for a family of our size. But being the youngest, the 4 of us older kids never thought we would be saying goodbye to him first at the age of 40.

My brother growing up was as strong as an ox and as brave as little soldier.

Let me tell you some quick stories about our childhood growing up...when Bradley and I were little kids ..he was 3 at the time. I was 4.5 at the time, we had a baby sitter in Calgary who would feed us kids nothing but vegetable soup w/milk. One day Bradley and I got fed up with this and ran away from her..but not before we packed up all our Star Wars characters in our Tonka truck and headed out when she wasn't looking.(smile /wink) We decided to make our way through Calgary on our way to mom's work. (pause) We finally made it to moms work place a couple hours later...quite a sight to see to little boys walking through the city on their way to moms work.

Then there was the time we went tobogganing at age 12 and Bradley was 10.5. At the top of the hill with me on the front of the sled and Bradley on the back..my younger brother managed to push me face first down while pulling my arms back..somehow I had become the sled for him and that "little bear" rode me down that hill. Again quite the site to see..Bradley on the sled and the sled on me while Bradley held my arms. By the time we made it back to the house..I was a bloody bruised and swollen mess. He laughed for days ..I looked like a puffy chipmunk.

My brother was a huge practical joker and a typical high spirited kid who loved his family.

Brad had many nicknames, but his most memorable one is "little bear", which he got at a very young age. There is a long story behind that. In later years that changed to "Canoe Head"..but to me he will always be Bradley my little brother.

I remember standing up for Bradley and Pattie at their wedding as his best man. It is a day I will never forget. My younger brother had become a man.

It was a special day I wont forget all the special memories of that day Derek was only a baby at the time. As I stood there beside him, I thought to myself, my younger brother is a man now. I was so proud of him as I could feel the love between him and Pattie then that never dimmed. Bradley loved Pattie.

Brad and Pattie were married for 20 years and together for 22years this July. They were a match made in heaven Their love created 2 more wonderful children, now teenagers Amanda 17 and Alicia 15. Derek who is now 20 has been there from the beginning watching his parents love grow over the years. Brad and Pattie were the couple that we all admired. It was Bradley's legacy and their contribution to the community.

Bradley had deep passions for fishing, hunting and camping which he shared with his family.Brad's passion for quadding was very apparent to everyone who knew him.Brad was doing what he loved when he was taken from this earth unexpectedly. This is the way Brad would have wanted to pass from this earth.

The only passion greater than being in the outdoors was his family. He loved his family and their happiness was his priority. His wife was not only his partner but his best friend. His 3 kids were his world. He always managed to do everything he could for them. Mom and Dad always said, Bradley made family a priority. He always made an effort and extended his hand in friendship to those he met. He was and continues to be a very happy man.

Bradley always said "Family First"

He was a great father, husband, brother and son.

He was a compassionate friend to all.

He was a very hard worker and craftsman.

Bradley believed and was passionate about his work...and he was good at it. A firm believer in doing your work to the best of your ability not just for the customer but for his satisfaction.

He tried to always convince the rest of us to forgive and move forward...something he did not just in word but his actions. This made Brad a man of true conviction. Maybe we all should take a page from his playbook and live by his example.

Brad was and had always been a daredevil his entire life but more importantly a real practical joker with all from his young life....as evidenced by my scars from tobogganing. James scars from the barbwire fence, Cheryl's got the whoopee cushion or the fart powder in Dads coffee.

Bradley took a huge amount of pleasure in good natured teasing of his daughters all with a goofy smile on his space. One thing I know about my younger brother he's smiling now as he looks down on us from heaven. I bet he's even having a beer now while he's fishing with Grampa Metzger or a drink with Gramma Potter and Uncle Ron.

He was a man with many layers ...which I learned some very private things about my brother in the past 48 hours that make me smile. It helps us all know that life doesn't have to be always so serious and thank god for people like my brother who like to make it more fun.

Bradley liked that.

I know there are far too many stories and memories to mention. Far too many people to talk about and how Bradley touched their lives.

I just want to close things up by saying...my younger brother was amazing. He is what many of us want to aspire to in life.

Loyal, caring, a friend, a brother, a father and most of all a dedicated family man. My brother was a man of true character with a humorous side to him. All that knew my brother speak very fondly of him and a teastement to his character is the friends and family that have shown up to remember him. He will be missed by all.

He will be missed by his wife and children...coworkers and the sibilings.

I love you brother and save a beer for me when we meet again. You were taken far too soon. We miss you and love you.

Back in Toronto Again

Matthew and I flew out to Alberta last Wednesday night, it was a great flight and a nice trip at first, though things quickly turned on a dime. We got to Calgary, rented our car, drove to Mom and dads and were there by 9pm, met up with Cheryl and we all had birthday cake for Dad who turned 71 that day and it was also Michelles' birthday and if I am correct she turned 28 that day. The day before she was in labor all day to have her and Jays first child and I am told at 11:52pm, she finally delivered her gorgeous baby girl Danika Ann Edwards. Congrats to you and Jay , Michelle on the new arrival.
 Anyhow to get back on track, the next morning we went with Mom and Dad to dads dialysis and went to visit Michelle and Jay and meet the baby. Cheryl and I left earlier and Matthew stayed with Mom and Dad. I went to the Innisfail Province and put in an obituary for my younger brother Brad. The Cheryl and I finished the flowers and got the squares and coffee and pop together for Brads luncheon after the memorial, id I mention that Patti and her family made all the sandwiches for it, wow I don't know where she got her strength that week.
 After Mom and Dad and Matt met Cheryl and I in Innisfail and we drove up to Drayton Valley to see Patti and the kids and say goodbye to Bradley before the service and in private at their home. It was a great day. The service was to be held on Saturday at 2pm.
 On Friday morning things just started to fall apart and Matthew and I decided to leave Mom and Dads where we were staying and went up to my sister Cheryls for the next 2 nights. Saturday Cheryl, Matt and I drove to Drayton Valley to attend the service for Brad. I delivered the Eulogy and this was the hardest thing I have ever done to this point in my life. Though I am so glad that I got the chance to do this and to say good bye and be with Patti and the kids, especially Amanda and Alicia. I do believe this has brought me closer to their family and this makes me happy.
 Matt and I decided to leave Alberta early for personal reasons and flew back home on the red eye on Sunday night, arriving back here in Toronto on Monday morning. Let me just say this trip was great and disasterous at the same time in certain ways. Things that went wrong, Charlene and her boyfriend Dale showed up and she was her typical self, the Potter clan still can not get along and just put things behind them , doesn't matter what family event it is, someone always has to fight about something and just ruin the day. Instead of coming together we get torn further apart, Bradley would be so disappointed in this. He was a strong family man and I know his one wish was just for us all to get along.
 Things that went wrong besides family were our brand new rental car broke down and the power steering went on the way to the service, after the service sitting for six hours waiting for the new rental car to show up from Edmonton, it never did! We had to drive back from Drayton with no steering to Innisfail on Saturday night and then back to Calgary to return the car on Sunday night, needless to say the rental was comped and I would recommend Enterprise Rental anytime.
 Other than the few family disputes I have to say I am glad that I went and I went to say good bye to my little brother and that is exactly what I did. I have no regrets and am just happy I managed to get through all this.
 Since getting back home Matt and I have been extremely busy and getting things done in the house again. We have had the electrician back and I started on the floors, yesterday I sanded and started to stain the kitchen and place our new cabinets. Matt has been extremely busy with the last of the framing, putting in the new doors upstairs and dry walling where we have moved walls and built new ones. He is really good at all this and I have nothing but respect for the way we have been working together and getting all done in our home.
Anyways I need to get back to work for now, I promise  to be here more and write a bit more and more often. In the next post I am going to put the eulogy which I wrote and read for my brother. I miss you lots and you were taken far to soon. We love you Bradley, "Little Bear".

For you Amanda, Alicia and Derek

For Amanda,Alicia and Derek,  you asked me to write a couple more stories and they make me smile as well when I think of them and write them and remember the good times and growing up with Brad.
Bradley growing up was a huge Kiss fan and his room was decorated with posters and he even had all the kiss dolls at one point and time. I on the other hand was a huge smurf fan and I had so many smurfs, all the small plastic figurines, all the small stuffed ones and my favorite the three large stuffed smurfs. I came home one day only to find my room fill with the stuffing from all my smurfs and the deflated smurfs now empty and shot full of arrow holes thanks to my brothers doing what they called target practice. I was so mad and so sad and Bradley just stood there in the door laughing, what a little bugger.
 There was also the time , I think I was 12 or 13 and Brad was well always a year and a bit younger than myself, Mom had dropped us out at Pine Lake and we were there for the day by ourselves and said we would behave and wanted to go fishing, We had just both gotten spears to fish with, these were the old ones that were elastic loaded and you had to pull back and then let the elastic go when you saw a fish, Brad and I were having one of our so typical little sibling rivalries and both under the water with our spears and wouldn't you know it he shot me through the foot, god that was painful and hurt so much and he said to me there. He also looked at me after and pleaded with me not to tell mom that he did it. He was such a little bugger in so many ways , but you also had to remember that he was the baby and that carried a lot of weight. Although it hurt like hell, I could never stay mad with him. Bradley was always a huge fisherman and it was one of the many things he enjoyed in life. Unlike me , he loved the simpler things and they made him happy. I often wish I had been more like Bradley.
 When I was in Grade 4 and Brad was in Grade 3, we lived in Calgary and the area we lived in was called West Dover. There was one summer afternoon and we were playing cops and robbers on our bikes. We were riding all over the city streets and I looked back to see where Brad was and all of a sudden I hit this parked car, had a huge gash in my leg and it was cut really bad, Bradley was so concerned for me, he ran home to get mom and Mom and James took me to the hospital.
 Bradley and I also had this babysitter in Calgary and we both disliked her tremendously, she was so mean to us and only fed us vegetable soup everyday , which we both hated. There was one day, we were there and Mom was at work at Calgary Motor Products, Brad and I gathered all our starwars characters and our other toys and as soon as she wasn't looking we headed off through the city of Calgary to find our Mom, we were crazy boys and always getting into some sort of trouble together. I can't believe we ran away from the sitter and headed through the busy streets of Calgary to find Mom.
 Then we grew up and we were still so close and Bradley was so caring. I got really sick in Drayton Valley when I lived there and Brad and Patti were the only family up there. I woke up one morning and was bleeding really bad from my kidneys and could hardly walk. Brad wanted me to go to the hospital in Drayton and I said no, I wanted to be close to Mom. So Brad and Patti hauled me down to Innisfail hospital in their truck and stayed with me and looked after me. After I was released from the hospital and back home in Drayton , Brad came over every day to make sure things were good and looked after me and he was so caring. He was just the type to put everyone elses needs before his own. We miss you so much my little brother.
 Growing up with Brad was a pleasure and always an adventure to say the least.But I miss the best friend I had growing up and am so glad I had the pleasure to be his older brother.

More Memories of My Little Brother

 Mom and I were just talking on the phone and she was reminding me of some of the things Bradley did as a child and I told her I would write them so there were never forgotten and so his children can look back on this for years to come and remember things about there dad and how great he was.
 When Brad was only about 3 and 1/2 years old, James had gone to the trouble of collecting all these tadpoles and put them in a tank in the house to watch them turn into frogs. Everyone was wondering where these tadpoles kept disappearing to as soon as they would get two legs and up on the log. Mom and dad caught Bradley the one day going into the fish tank and eating them, he was always a little evil and a very mischeivious boy.
 Another story about Bradley was when he was 5 or 6, I believe he was in Grade one and it was lunch time and everyone was going outside to eat, Bradleys teacher tried to stop him and threw Bradley over his shoulder, Brad having his full lunch bag and being himself took his bag and hit the teacher over the head , knocking him out cold. The teacher never expected for there to be a full can of pop in the bag. Bradley was suspended from school for the first time of many times. I don't know how many calls Mom got to come and get Bradley from school because he was in trouble. I don't think Brad was bad, he was just independent and very much himself and very very stubborn and set in his ways.
 There are so many stories of my little brother and so many things to remember about him and the way he was and how caring he was. Bradley was all about family and that was so important to him in every way. He was a fabulous father, honorable, and great husband, a loving son and a super brother, For all of us who got to have Brad in our lives, we were lucky and blessed for every day we had him. It will always seem too short and like time has been stolen from us.
 Also a note to all who read this and want to help by donation, there will be a memorial fund set up for my sister in law and her children and by Thursday. This fund will be the Brad Potter Memorial and all monies will go to his wife and kids to help them during their time of need. If you wish to you may contact me and I will give you all details about this and how you can help Patti, Derek , Amanda and Alicia during this time. I thank you all again for reading and Please share your stories of my Younger brother Brad, Gone but never forgotten, a life taken far too soon from all of us. 

My Younger Brother

 As many of you know my younger brother Bradley passed away suddenly on Sunday May 20th just after 9pm while quadding with his youngest daughter Alicia just outside Drayton Valley Alberta. This was a tragic accident and is horrible for all of us that loved him and knew him and especially for his wonderful wife and best friend Patti of 22 years and their three children Derek, Amanda and Alicia.
 Yesterday was one of the saddest days for me and for my entire family. I will always remember my little brother Bradley, "Little Bear" as he was nicknamed as a child. He brought joy and love to everyone he knew and he will be greatly missed. We love you Brad.  
 For those of you who did not know my little brother, you missed knowing a great man and a wonderful friend to everyone he met. Bradley always told me to forgive and forget and leave the past in the past where it belonged and that is what I learned to do with him. Over the last couple months we had gotten closer again and were talking on the phone and he would help me with advice on the renovations Matt and I are doing in the house here in Toronto.
 Bradley was a devoted husband and would and did do anything for his wife and family. He loved Patti and his children more than anything else and always made sure they were well taken care of and loved by him every minute, he was a great father and would do anything for his son and his two daughters. His youngest daughter Alicia was born ill and needed a liver transplant and I remember Brad and Patti and how devoted they were to get her healthy again and back in good health. They spent so much time in Edmonton with her and were the most amazing parents and the love they shared was truly one of a kind. They made it through after several years of traveling back and forth from Drayton to Edmonton and Patti having to stay at the Ronald Mcdonald House and several surgeries for Alicia over the years. But that little girl meant the world to Bradley and became a beautiful teenage girl today.
 He was the most dedicated father and husband I have ever seen and I always admired and respected him for that. Bradley and Patti met when they were teenagers and through thick and thin met every challenge and managed to survive and stay together and grow together as their love got stronger and stronger. If you looked up true love you would see a picture of my little brother and his wife Patti.
 Bradley as a child could be a rotten little monster but he always did everything so cute and could get away with almost anything. Let me tell you a few of my favorite memories of growing up with Bradley. We were only a year and half apart so we were always quite close and did so much together growing up. We even had some of the same girl friends and many of the same friends in the small town of Bowden where he will be deeply and sadly missed by all who knew and loved him as well.
 When Brad was young , he had to be around 3 and 1/2 or 4 years old and we lived on the farm out by Pine Lake, I can remember my mother planting potatoes and all of a sudden Bradley was trying to plant himself and mom asked what he was doing and he said he wanted to grow more Bradleys. He did this so innocently and truly believed that he could grow more of himself and little clones if he planted himself like a potato. I now wish he could have.
 Another of my favorite memories was of Bradley when he was around 11 years old and we lived in Bowden and Mom and Dad had a store at that time called Double D. Any how Brad and I were at the store and a friend of ours Tamara Sawatsky came in and she was bugging Bardley and called him a Homosepian, well Bradley didn't know what that was and hit Tamara across the head with a hockey stick knocking her out, not funny then but now to look back it was hilarious.
 I have many memories of Bradley and I growing up and won't share them all with you right now but will share a couple more, I remember going sledding with him in Bowden once I had to be 12 and I believe he had just turned 11, we were behind Sinclairs on the hill and we were about to go down on the sled, I was in front and Bradley pushed me off and basically rode the sled down on top of me all the way to the bottom. I looked like a bloody chipmunk and my face was all swollen and bloody. Bradley laughed but man was I mad, Irene Gourlay picked me up and took me home . Not funny then but now a great memory of the things we did and the fun we had together as kids.
 Bradley was always very accepting of my lifestyle and my choices and years ago when I was dating Henry in Edmonton we often went to visit Brad and Patti in Drayton Valley where I also once lived because Brad lived there and helped me to get a job there and a really cute little trailer to live in.I had the pleasure of being Bradley's best man and one of only two people to stand up for and be at the wedding of Patti and Brad and I still have all those pictures. It was an honor for me and one I have never had since. When Patti and Bradley were married they were very young and living in Drayton Valley and their first child Derek was there with us.
Patti and Brad were truly amazing together and I am sure that Patti will be truly amazing on her own as well.
 To my youngest brother I will miss you and always love you. Thank you for being my friend, my brother and at times a confidant. I love you and still can't believe you are gone. You may be gone in flesh but will always be in our hearts and memories and will live on forever through your children, wife and all who knew you.
 Rest in Peace Brad. Born December 1, 1971 and taken away far to soon on May 20th, 2012.
 Please add any of your memories of Bradley in comments if you like. 

Our New Hood

Matthew and I both are very pleased with our new hood and are loving everything about it thus far. We have both met a lot of the neighbors and they all seem to be very friendly and welcoming. I have met more of our neighbors on the block and so far am really liking all of them. Met a gentlemen and his wife the other day and they have given me some numbers for different trades peoples and contractors that they used on their house when they redid it a couple years ago.
The cats and dogs are also loving the neighborhood and Sparky is out everyday running wild and being a free little boy as he was in Vancouver, He is a very independent cat and loves to roam free. Nadia on the other hand only seems to go out when the dogs and us are outside and with her. Rogue is very happy with all the other dogs in the hood and is constantly chasing them down and investigating, it has come to the point where we have to keep her on a leash when we are out front so she doesn't run in to the street. Storm is just a little sucky and never leaves my side at all. Love our kids.
Wayne has been coming over at least once a week and visiting with us and brings Jade with him, so nice when all three of the girls get together and run free around the back yard. Also nice to see Wayne as much as we have, we always have a great visit and he stays and usually has a nice barbequed meal with us and a cocktail and we just sit on the back deck and catch up. Good times, nice to be in a house again instead of the small apartment, just to have the space and be able to sleep in if one of us gets up earlier.
Last week we got a lot accomplished again, we have framed for our new bathroom and also taken down the kitchen wall, moved the living room back another 4 feet and prepped the framing in between the living and dining room for french doors when we find them. Layed a new sub floor upstairs for the new bathroom and are getting ready to get the electricians in for a final run of all new wiring. Then we can get to work putting up new dry wall and finishing all the floors. Work work work and more work to do, but it is going to be so damn great when we are done.
Matthews friend Marc is coming for a visit from Vancouver next month and has offered to help us a bit while he is here and then at the end of June is PRIDE, yay, time to let lose and have some fun damn it. I will also be turning 42 the first week of June, god I can't believe I am that old already. Well life is great right now for us and it is actually time for me to get my butt in gear and go and putter around the garden for a bit. Have a great long weekend! 

Wow, we have accomplished alot thus far

 So Matthew and I have been in the house for 7 weeks now and are accomplishing a lot of stuff. We have put our open beams along the stair well and opened up the wall to the kitchen and put a new open beam up there as well, built a new wall in between the living and dining room and framed for our french doors there. We also started to scrape the old popcorn finish off the upstairs ceilings, scraped all the glue off the floors and removed all drywall from the main floor ceilings so we can insulate and rewire. Plumbers and electricians have been in and out of the house to complete quotes as to what needs to be redone and finished so we can drywall again. Our living room is now 3 feet larger than it was and the dining room is a bit smaller, a choice which was one of the best that we have made. We bought new eaves for the house and we are going to put those up this week, as the old ones got ripped off by the idiot who use to rent here and supposedly redid everything in the house, what a dumb ass, dry wall screws used in everything. and not even full 2 x 4,s in the make shift walls he built, and this man passes himself off as a contractor, Really, come on man are you serious!
 Other than renovating the house we have been extremely busy as well, I had a doctors last week and another specialists appointment, One more specialist appointment this month and then hopefully I done for the summer. They are trying me on a new experimental drug for now you to treat neuropothy and hopefully this will help to subside the headaches and help me get through this for the summer at least. I also need to try and quit smoking as I have been diagnosed with C.O.P.D. and enphysema which are affecting my breathing and causes my shortness of breath. Still no diagnoses of the Horner's Syndrome as of yet!
 Matt and I have met most of the neighbors now and they seem pretty good and nice, Mara and Jeff live three doors down and have 2 little girls, a lovely couple, brought us a nice banana loaf yesterday for a treat, um so tasty. Right next door are Jim and Deanna , and on the other side is the previous owner of the house Wayne, Next to him is this lovely older lady Flora, who is color crazy and has a 3 different tone of purple house and plants like you would not believe.  Next to Jim and Deanna is Xavier, seems to be a nice gentleman. So far so great and we both love our new neighborhood.
 The girls really like the neighborhood as well and so do Sparky and Nadia, they are loving running around and getting out again. Well that is all I have for you all today, Have a great week and talk to you all soon, take care for now from your gay neighbors.