It seems like yesterday and the memories are still so fresh and beautiful. It was a year ago today that I went out to visit Mom and Dad and surprise Mom for her birthday. She was so happy and glad to see me and we had such a great week. We went shopping and we got her picture taken with Santa and her, dad and I went to Sandys Restaurant for Chinese Food Buffet. The smile on moms face was priceless and the way she ate that night was amazing. I never would have thought that 6 months after I left that day she would be gone.
I will always remember going shopping with her and the both of us trying every tape measure in Canadian Tire trying to find the perfect one for Matt for Christmas, Then going to different thrift stores and just looking at different things and seeing what treasures we could find. It was always our thing to go to thrift stores together and check out every thing in the store, from Christmas angels to glasses that neither of us really needed but always wanted to have.
Today I sit here and I cry all day alone realizing all I want to do is call her and talk to her and be with her and just comfort her. I miss my mom so much that it just hurts.
It was March 15th when Mom was diagnosed with Cancer again and by the time I got there May 27th to see her, she was so weak and had lost so much weight and was basically just laying on the couch. Even though that was my final week with her, it was still one of the best weeks of my life because I got to spend it with her. I miss her everyday and wish she had more time and was still here. I will never forget finding her that morning and never forget the week that followed, but for now I will always remember that last great time we had together on her birthday last year. To my Mom I wish you a happy birthday on November 29th. She would have been 69 this year, so young and so fabulous, I had the best Mom and I loved her more than anything and anyone in the world. You are a wonderful lady and please know I will miss you and cherish every moment we had together for the rest of my life.
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Friday, November 21, 2014
Our Mothers
On June 1st of this year I lost my Mom to Cancer, It was one of the hardest and worse things I have ever gone through and I realized at that moment the most important person in the world to me was gone and I could no longer just call on her and talk to her everyday. On November 6th my husband Matt lost his wonderful Mom to Cancer and I was there with him and his dad and cousin Gilly on the day she passed away. It again was a horrible and sad day for the both of us and on this day Matt and I learned we now have to count on each other even more than before.
Our mothers were very similar, both very strong and wonderful supportive women, who loved and gave their everything until the end, both married and stayed with the man they loved for a very long time, my parents just past 52 years married and Matts just shy of 55 years married.
Both of our Moms were the most important people in our lives. They were both nurturing and loving to the end and stood by us. My husband and I both suffer the same pain as many of my friends do, losing your mother I think is the worst and hardest thing ever.
Matts Mom was a very strong and extremely intelligent and beautiful woman, she loved Matt until the end, and he loved her, spending his nights with her in Hospice, only leaving to go home and have a quick shower. He stood by her until the end and spent every waking moment to be with his Mom the last few months. Matt definitely got his Moms strength and integrity.
Our mothers both believed in god and prayed and loved us until the end. They were both proud of their gay sons and supported us in every way possible. Matt and I sit here now and discuss how similar our parents are in many ways. Our Mothers and our fathers. Now we both look after an ailing father and deal with our grieve for our wonderful moms. To Vera Megan Allsopp, thank you for bringing up a wonderful young man for me to marry and love. I could not have asked for a better mother in law, and to Mom I am so proud to have had you as my mother, I miss you both every day and love both of you. Now you can both finally meet.
Our mothers were very similar, both very strong and wonderful supportive women, who loved and gave their everything until the end, both married and stayed with the man they loved for a very long time, my parents just past 52 years married and Matts just shy of 55 years married.
Both of our Moms were the most important people in our lives. They were both nurturing and loving to the end and stood by us. My husband and I both suffer the same pain as many of my friends do, losing your mother I think is the worst and hardest thing ever.
Matts Mom was a very strong and extremely intelligent and beautiful woman, she loved Matt until the end, and he loved her, spending his nights with her in Hospice, only leaving to go home and have a quick shower. He stood by her until the end and spent every waking moment to be with his Mom the last few months. Matt definitely got his Moms strength and integrity.
Our mothers both believed in god and prayed and loved us until the end. They were both proud of their gay sons and supported us in every way possible. Matt and I sit here now and discuss how similar our parents are in many ways. Our Mothers and our fathers. Now we both look after an ailing father and deal with our grieve for our wonderful moms. To Vera Megan Allsopp, thank you for bringing up a wonderful young man for me to marry and love. I could not have asked for a better mother in law, and to Mom I am so proud to have had you as my mother, I miss you both every day and love both of you. Now you can both finally meet.
I wonder
I sit here and think many days about many things now that mom is gone and I wonder if you believe in God and in Heaven as my mother did, do you go to heaven, do you get to be reunited with the people you lost before you. I have to ask because for me I don't know what I believe for those who do believe , do they get what they believed in and do they go to the god they prayed to?
These are all things I am wondering about, is my mother with Brad and my Uncle Ron, and my grandparents, does she get to see her best friend again?
I am not sure what I believe and I definitely do not believe in religion but I do believe in a higher power whether that is god or whatever or whoever?
I just honestly hope that Mom is sitting up and watching over me and got to be with Bradley again and is having tea and fishing with my grandfather and talking with Uncle Ron and seeing all of our old neighbors and discussing how great their kids are here on earth. I hope this is the way it is and what she is doing.
My mom as many mothers were taken far too soon and now I just mourn her death and know that she is not in pain but have a hard time believing that she is happy, I can only hope she is. Hope is a whole other thing in that respect as I had hoped for years that my mother would never get sick and suffer the way she did. I had always thought she would be here and we could talk in the phone.
In the end I am just left wondering and will never know. Miss you Mom and love you lots.
These are all things I am wondering about, is my mother with Brad and my Uncle Ron, and my grandparents, does she get to see her best friend again?
I am not sure what I believe and I definitely do not believe in religion but I do believe in a higher power whether that is god or whatever or whoever?
I just honestly hope that Mom is sitting up and watching over me and got to be with Bradley again and is having tea and fishing with my grandfather and talking with Uncle Ron and seeing all of our old neighbors and discussing how great their kids are here on earth. I hope this is the way it is and what she is doing.
My mom as many mothers were taken far too soon and now I just mourn her death and know that she is not in pain but have a hard time believing that she is happy, I can only hope she is. Hope is a whole other thing in that respect as I had hoped for years that my mother would never get sick and suffer the way she did. I had always thought she would be here and we could talk in the phone.
In the end I am just left wondering and will never know. Miss you Mom and love you lots.
Saturday, November 1, 2014
Hubby Gone Again
Well I know it has been forever but I honestly have had the worst year I could ever imagine and I will tell you a bit about that so you can fully understand what I am doing and going through in my fabulous little life.
But first things first , Matt was gone all summer from July 2nd until September 21 and then was home until October 26th and had to leave unexpectedly again. As some of you may know Matts mom was diagnosed with Cancer in early July and he had to spend most of the summer there with his folks and deal with stuff out in Vancouver. It has been a hard year for both of us but extremely hard being apart. As of last Sunday his mom was put into Hospice and is not going to be getting out and they have told us it is now just a matter of time whether that be a week or a month from now we do not know so he flew back out to Vancouver to be with her and has been spending every night at hospice with her.
I have nothing but the utmost respect for Matts mom and love her dearly, I am having an extremely hard time with this as well and it has only been 5 months to date since mom passed away from almost the same cancers. It is also extremely hard for both of us as our fathers are both not well too. My father is on dialysis three days a week and Matts dad has been recently diagnosed with Alzeimers.
I can not imagine losing Mom Allsopp this year as well but now it is become a reality and is just going to happen. I am still grieving my mom every day and do not think the pain will ever go away and am not sure I want it to, It reminds me every day how fabulous a mother I had and how much I miss her.
I will be flying out to Vancouver as well here in the next couple weeks and be there for Matt, not sure what kind of support I will be but I will try and I will be there for him and stand by him. His mother , like my mother is the world to Matt and I never thought that in the same year we would both lose our moms.
Other things that have happened this summer to us is we lost my brother inlaw Lorne who passed away in September, I feel bad for Cheryl but am still not ready to reconnect with her totally. I can not imagine losing my spouse.
A few more changes in our lives this year, our former best friends Ken and Barbie and Skunkhead, (obviously not their real names) are no longer our friends and they can't even handle to say hi. Matt and I were both fooled by their phoniness and extreme childish behavior. Oh well I am so glad they are no longer a part of our lives. I am so glad that those jealous people.
I honestly thought I would miss them after supposedly being their best friends for the last two years but I do not.
I have been keeping myself busy in the house and doing the final little things around here to complete our renovations but yet everyday I seem to add a new project to the list and keep doing them and then add another. I have given all the floors another coat of varnish, redid some of the kitchen and added a pantry , touched up all the paint in the house and finally finished the stairs. I also redid two pieces of furniture for the house and built patio table and bench.
Now the new projects for this month are to wallpaper the bathroom, paint the ceiling in the powder room silver, give the stairs another coat of varnish. I am also building some built in shelves for the sides of the fireplace I built last year.
I have also started my own design business and have to give a quote for a job here soon, I also refinish antique furniture and am currently working on three large pieces for a neighbor and good friend. Anyhow I will keep you all up to date with Matts mom and what is happening. Thanks for reading and I will try to be back sooner than I have been in the past.
But first things first , Matt was gone all summer from July 2nd until September 21 and then was home until October 26th and had to leave unexpectedly again. As some of you may know Matts mom was diagnosed with Cancer in early July and he had to spend most of the summer there with his folks and deal with stuff out in Vancouver. It has been a hard year for both of us but extremely hard being apart. As of last Sunday his mom was put into Hospice and is not going to be getting out and they have told us it is now just a matter of time whether that be a week or a month from now we do not know so he flew back out to Vancouver to be with her and has been spending every night at hospice with her.
I have nothing but the utmost respect for Matts mom and love her dearly, I am having an extremely hard time with this as well and it has only been 5 months to date since mom passed away from almost the same cancers. It is also extremely hard for both of us as our fathers are both not well too. My father is on dialysis three days a week and Matts dad has been recently diagnosed with Alzeimers.
I can not imagine losing Mom Allsopp this year as well but now it is become a reality and is just going to happen. I am still grieving my mom every day and do not think the pain will ever go away and am not sure I want it to, It reminds me every day how fabulous a mother I had and how much I miss her.
I will be flying out to Vancouver as well here in the next couple weeks and be there for Matt, not sure what kind of support I will be but I will try and I will be there for him and stand by him. His mother , like my mother is the world to Matt and I never thought that in the same year we would both lose our moms.
Other things that have happened this summer to us is we lost my brother inlaw Lorne who passed away in September, I feel bad for Cheryl but am still not ready to reconnect with her totally. I can not imagine losing my spouse.
A few more changes in our lives this year, our former best friends Ken and Barbie and Skunkhead, (obviously not their real names) are no longer our friends and they can't even handle to say hi. Matt and I were both fooled by their phoniness and extreme childish behavior. Oh well I am so glad they are no longer a part of our lives. I am so glad that those jealous people.
I honestly thought I would miss them after supposedly being their best friends for the last two years but I do not.
I have been keeping myself busy in the house and doing the final little things around here to complete our renovations but yet everyday I seem to add a new project to the list and keep doing them and then add another. I have given all the floors another coat of varnish, redid some of the kitchen and added a pantry , touched up all the paint in the house and finally finished the stairs. I also redid two pieces of furniture for the house and built patio table and bench.
Now the new projects for this month are to wallpaper the bathroom, paint the ceiling in the powder room silver, give the stairs another coat of varnish. I am also building some built in shelves for the sides of the fireplace I built last year.
I have also started my own design business and have to give a quote for a job here soon, I also refinish antique furniture and am currently working on three large pieces for a neighbor and good friend. Anyhow I will keep you all up to date with Matts mom and what is happening. Thanks for reading and I will try to be back sooner than I have been in the past.
Sunday, July 20, 2014
Hubby away
Well Matt left for his trip to Vancouver on July 2nd and has extended it to stay longer for personal reasons so I miss him lots but am so glad he is where he needs to be. I have been getting a lot accomplished since he has been gone. I have revarnished the floors on the main level, Reconfigured
the kitchen layout and repainted the master bedroom and started to repaint the bathroom as well.
Been working my ass off and trying to stay busy with Matt gone and trying to stay extra busy to keep my mind off everything.
I have also stained the stairs and repainted the back of the stairs as well and making our house look amazing again as it already does. I love our little house and everything about it. I think I will always be doing something here because it is my nature and I like to keep busy.
Seven weeks today since Mom is gone and I hate it more everyday. I miss her so much and am so sad. I just still can't believe she is gone. It feels so weird not to be able to call her or talk to her when I need to and want to. Everything I do, I wish I could tell her and send her pictures, but most of all I wish I could go and spend more time with her.
I still have not spoken to any of my family except for Dad who I have become very close to and am enjoying our new relationship. We talk on the phone at least 2 times a week now and I do so enjoy our conversations and everything.
I can not believe yet that my sister an brother would not even take a day off when they found out their Mom passed away. It just makes me sick and then to think that they could not even help me with the arrangements for mom, or with cleaning up the house and doing everything. They are disgusting in everyway and I guess I always knew that.
I don't think I will ever speak to them again and I am okay with that now. I have family and am glad for the family that I have. Anyhow I don't really have a lot to say, I am sad and just need a day of alone time.
Please take care and thanks for reading, I promise to be back and write sooner than I have been.
the kitchen layout and repainted the master bedroom and started to repaint the bathroom as well.
Been working my ass off and trying to stay busy with Matt gone and trying to stay extra busy to keep my mind off everything.
I have also stained the stairs and repainted the back of the stairs as well and making our house look amazing again as it already does. I love our little house and everything about it. I think I will always be doing something here because it is my nature and I like to keep busy.
Seven weeks today since Mom is gone and I hate it more everyday. I miss her so much and am so sad. I just still can't believe she is gone. It feels so weird not to be able to call her or talk to her when I need to and want to. Everything I do, I wish I could tell her and send her pictures, but most of all I wish I could go and spend more time with her.
I still have not spoken to any of my family except for Dad who I have become very close to and am enjoying our new relationship. We talk on the phone at least 2 times a week now and I do so enjoy our conversations and everything.
I can not believe yet that my sister an brother would not even take a day off when they found out their Mom passed away. It just makes me sick and then to think that they could not even help me with the arrangements for mom, or with cleaning up the house and doing everything. They are disgusting in everyway and I guess I always knew that.
I don't think I will ever speak to them again and I am okay with that now. I have family and am glad for the family that I have. Anyhow I don't really have a lot to say, I am sad and just need a day of alone time.
Please take care and thanks for reading, I promise to be back and write sooner than I have been.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Feeling Lucky
I am feeling lucky for many reasons today, and also very sad in many other ways. I feel very happy and lucky to have a great husband, who puts up with me, stands by me and supports me and has been more than fantastic this last month. I also have great friends and a few distant relatives who make life easier and just care so much, It is nice to feel loved and needed by people. My inlaws are also about the most amazing family anyone could ever ask for. Plus I have our dogs and cats who just know when you need a little extra love.
But the biggest reason I feel lucky today is memories of my mother and the great time we had together always, but my fondest memories are from the last two visits and how I got to be with her. For anyone that knows me, and knew Mom, you could see where I get my attitude, my personality and my views on life. I got it all from her and am so glad that I did.
My time out with Mom and Dad in November was amazing and I flew out for Moms birthday and took them out for Chinese food, everytime we talked on the phone after that, Mom always brought it up, that it was her best birthday and her favorite meal ever. I am just so glad that I went to see her and spent that time with her, we went shopping that week, got to go to thrift stores and her and I both loved that, just to find that little treasure and take it home for a buck or two. Helping her to get her house reading for Christmas and just the smile on her face whenever I walked through that door to see her, Makes me happy and sad all at once, knowing I will not see her smile again or hear her voice.
My second visit this year was the end of May and I am so glad I did it and know now that the universe was on my side for when I went and everything that happened while I was there. When I phoned Mom on Mothers day this year I apologized for not sending anything but told her that I was going to send something out the end of May, and I did, I sent me out to be with her and Dad. I was so happy to be there and the look on her face when I walked in and she saw me was just priceless, but Mom did not look like Mom then, she was so tiny and grey but she still had that great smile and her face just lit up as soon as I walked through the door. Those are the memories I try to hold onto and am so glad I have them because I will have something many people will never have and that is I got to be there and say good bye. I never wanted to say good bye to her and thought that I would have more time. But I am so thankful for the time we had all the things we did together throughout our lives. She was the best mother to me and I will never stop missing her and will also always love her with all my heart. It feels like I am missing a piece of my heart everyday now that she is gone and I know this does not change and went through this before with Bradley. It never does get easier, just different.
I also got so much closer to Dad over the last month , it has been amazing and am so happy for that, he has come along way and is an amazing man, was not always there for me , but somehow we are there for each other now. Dad said he loved me for the first time in ten years before I left Alberta to come back here three weeks ago and I must say those were the most amazing words I have ever heard from him in so long. I love my father and yes we have had our hurdles, challenges and disputes over the years but we have also managed to now put all that behind us and go on with a new start as Mom would have wanted.
Thank you for your support and love , not just now but always. love to all of you.
But the biggest reason I feel lucky today is memories of my mother and the great time we had together always, but my fondest memories are from the last two visits and how I got to be with her. For anyone that knows me, and knew Mom, you could see where I get my attitude, my personality and my views on life. I got it all from her and am so glad that I did.
My time out with Mom and Dad in November was amazing and I flew out for Moms birthday and took them out for Chinese food, everytime we talked on the phone after that, Mom always brought it up, that it was her best birthday and her favorite meal ever. I am just so glad that I went to see her and spent that time with her, we went shopping that week, got to go to thrift stores and her and I both loved that, just to find that little treasure and take it home for a buck or two. Helping her to get her house reading for Christmas and just the smile on her face whenever I walked through that door to see her, Makes me happy and sad all at once, knowing I will not see her smile again or hear her voice.
My second visit this year was the end of May and I am so glad I did it and know now that the universe was on my side for when I went and everything that happened while I was there. When I phoned Mom on Mothers day this year I apologized for not sending anything but told her that I was going to send something out the end of May, and I did, I sent me out to be with her and Dad. I was so happy to be there and the look on her face when I walked in and she saw me was just priceless, but Mom did not look like Mom then, she was so tiny and grey but she still had that great smile and her face just lit up as soon as I walked through the door. Those are the memories I try to hold onto and am so glad I have them because I will have something many people will never have and that is I got to be there and say good bye. I never wanted to say good bye to her and thought that I would have more time. But I am so thankful for the time we had all the things we did together throughout our lives. She was the best mother to me and I will never stop missing her and will also always love her with all my heart. It feels like I am missing a piece of my heart everyday now that she is gone and I know this does not change and went through this before with Bradley. It never does get easier, just different.
I also got so much closer to Dad over the last month , it has been amazing and am so happy for that, he has come along way and is an amazing man, was not always there for me , but somehow we are there for each other now. Dad said he loved me for the first time in ten years before I left Alberta to come back here three weeks ago and I must say those were the most amazing words I have ever heard from him in so long. I love my father and yes we have had our hurdles, challenges and disputes over the years but we have also managed to now put all that behind us and go on with a new start as Mom would have wanted.
Thank you for your support and love , not just now but always. love to all of you.
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
World Pride is among us
Well World Pride kicked off last Friday and Matt and I went to city hall for the Flag Raising and to watch performances. It was fun, but hell waiting and waiting was excrutiating on my back standing there. You know you are getting old when your back stiffens up from standing on hard pavement for over 4 hours and you are unwilling to pay 10 bucks for a beer!
We did get to see some great performers though. There were a couple different gentlemen singers and then one of my favorites Deborah Cox, love her and then we saw Melissa Ethridge. Our first free concert of Pride this year so far. Love all these free shows and events.
Trying to get out and have a little fun and relax as I know this is one thing Mom would have wanted for me to do.
Tomorrow night we are going to a white party, yes everyone is suppose to wear white, need to find Matt something to wear and hopefully the weather will change and the rain will let up for a day as you never want to get caught in a rain storm in white. Though that could be fun and give me a bit of attention, LOL.
We will probably meet up with Nancy and Wayne at some point this weekend and go out and walk Church Street to see what they have to offer this year and what is new and going on. Also was asked to walk with Olivia Chow in the parade, will have to see how we feel and how hot it is going to be for the weekend! You never know.
Right after Pride Matt leaves for Vancouver for two weeks and goes to see his folks and is going to a friend of ours wedding, glad he is going to see Mom and Dad in Vancouver. They are very important to me and to us.
This also means we will not be together for our anniversary which is alright I guess, as we will have many more to celebrate and be with each other and maybe a couple weeks alone is just what I need right now.
Anyways back to the couch and my relaxing day of watching Wimbledon Tennis. Have a great week and a wonderful day. Thanks for reading and please take care.
We did get to see some great performers though. There were a couple different gentlemen singers and then one of my favorites Deborah Cox, love her and then we saw Melissa Ethridge. Our first free concert of Pride this year so far. Love all these free shows and events.
Trying to get out and have a little fun and relax as I know this is one thing Mom would have wanted for me to do.
Tomorrow night we are going to a white party, yes everyone is suppose to wear white, need to find Matt something to wear and hopefully the weather will change and the rain will let up for a day as you never want to get caught in a rain storm in white. Though that could be fun and give me a bit of attention, LOL.
We will probably meet up with Nancy and Wayne at some point this weekend and go out and walk Church Street to see what they have to offer this year and what is new and going on. Also was asked to walk with Olivia Chow in the parade, will have to see how we feel and how hot it is going to be for the weekend! You never know.
Right after Pride Matt leaves for Vancouver for two weeks and goes to see his folks and is going to a friend of ours wedding, glad he is going to see Mom and Dad in Vancouver. They are very important to me and to us.
This also means we will not be together for our anniversary which is alright I guess, as we will have many more to celebrate and be with each other and maybe a couple weeks alone is just what I need right now.
Anyways back to the couch and my relaxing day of watching Wimbledon Tennis. Have a great week and a wonderful day. Thanks for reading and please take care.
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
Miss Mom
Everyday is so different and I miss Mom so much more everyday, every minute and every waking second, even when I am sleeping I am dreaming I am talking to her ad sharing things about my life and what is going on. It seems to get harder everyday and not easier as I thought it might. I wonder every minute way she is gone and why it happened so quickly, there will always be things I wish I could have said, time I wish I could have spent with her and phone calls I should have made. I just plain miss her and wish she was here for just a bit longer so I could have more time.
Last night was really hard as we found out Mom's best friend of the last two years Kelly Passed away suddenly in her sleep, she was a beautiful woman and one who I had met on several occasions and helped with the process of losing Mom, which was amazing and she was so sweet and caring. I can not believe she is gone and will not be here.
I now miss her too, and am just having a really bad day and missing life and everything which use to be in it. I hate the fact that we have to suffer loss and I really hate it when people say it was gods will or plan, Fuck off! I am not dealing with gods plan or gods will and do not believe for a minute that my mother was near old enough, she was 68, Kelly was in her early 50's, gods will my ass. If there is and was a god he would not want people to even get cancer and suffer as \Mom did.
Anyways not much else to say today , except I miss Mom, and wish she was still here, so much I want to tell her right now.
Mourning!
Last night was really hard as we found out Mom's best friend of the last two years Kelly Passed away suddenly in her sleep, she was a beautiful woman and one who I had met on several occasions and helped with the process of losing Mom, which was amazing and she was so sweet and caring. I can not believe she is gone and will not be here.
I now miss her too, and am just having a really bad day and missing life and everything which use to be in it. I hate the fact that we have to suffer loss and I really hate it when people say it was gods will or plan, Fuck off! I am not dealing with gods plan or gods will and do not believe for a minute that my mother was near old enough, she was 68, Kelly was in her early 50's, gods will my ass. If there is and was a god he would not want people to even get cancer and suffer as \Mom did.
Anyways not much else to say today , except I miss Mom, and wish she was still here, so much I want to tell her right now.
Mourning!
Monday, June 16, 2014
My Mother
My mother , the most amazing woman I have ever had the pleasure to know passed away from complications with her battle with Cancer on June 1st, 2014.
Since this day I have felt a loss and a total emptiness that no one can ever replace and there is a hole in my life that will never be filled. I miss her so much and go to pick up the phone everyday to see how she is, or chat or tell her something good or what is going on in my life.
To me she was my best friend, we use to go shopping together, I told her everything about my life and what was going on and always talked to her as much as possible.
I found out that her cancer had returned with aggression on March 15th and was so worried but still never expected to lose her this quickly. I was lucky as I flew out to Alberta to surprise her on May 27th and got to spend an amazing 5 days with her and dad. If you could have seen her face when I walked through the door that night, it was priceless and a vision I will hold in my memories for the rest of my life. I also got to be there when she passed away and to be with dad for support and love. These are the best things I have done, just to have her know that I loved her and I truly did.
For those of you who knew Mom, you knew she was feisty and spoke her mind, I am so thankful to have gotten those qualities from her. She was always about her family and that meant more to her than any material item ever could. She loved people and animals equally and those were her favorite and most cherished things in life. Unfortunately her family was not under the same thought. my brother and sisters were not there the last two years and for this I will never forgive them. Ever since Brads death they have not spoken to my Mother or Father or me! they will have to live with that for the rest of their lives.
The saddest thing about all of this is, the Saturday night before Mom passed I had convinced her to phone James and Cheryl and Charlene and let them know that she was ill with cancer again, we never got the chance to phone them.
When I did phone them on the Sunday to let them know Mom had passed away, it suddenly became about them and how Mom had not spoke to them for two years, last I checked they all had phones, but the worst thing was Cheryl and James would not even take time off work to come see dad, or to help with any arrangements or anything. I can not believe I am even related to these people some days.
My greatest support was my Aunt Vera and moms dear friend Kelly. I had so much to do, which included dealing with the coroner that day and then making all arrangements for moms cremation, writing and paying for obituary, packing up the entire house and helping to put everything in storage and also helping to get dad settled with my nephew Kory, who was helpful in moving stuff out of the house, and has been looking after Dad since Moms passing and getting him back and forth to Dialysis 3 days a week.
Mom was a truly loving person and a fabulous mother, always supportive of me and helpful in every way she could. Giving me advice at all points in my life and just calling to say hi. I miss all these things and wish I could get just one more day to tell her how much she meant and do more for her.
Life will go on for me, though I am not sure how somedays, nothing has hit me yet and I am still feeling very numb and just miss her every minute.
She was beautiful and a great lady, and her life was far too short here. She will be missed a great deal and will now be with her son Bradley, her little brother Ron and her parents. I love you Mom and miss you always. Life will never be the same, and will never get better but it will be good and different. Know always you were the most influential person in my life and that I love you so much and always will.
Since this day I have felt a loss and a total emptiness that no one can ever replace and there is a hole in my life that will never be filled. I miss her so much and go to pick up the phone everyday to see how she is, or chat or tell her something good or what is going on in my life.
To me she was my best friend, we use to go shopping together, I told her everything about my life and what was going on and always talked to her as much as possible.
I found out that her cancer had returned with aggression on March 15th and was so worried but still never expected to lose her this quickly. I was lucky as I flew out to Alberta to surprise her on May 27th and got to spend an amazing 5 days with her and dad. If you could have seen her face when I walked through the door that night, it was priceless and a vision I will hold in my memories for the rest of my life. I also got to be there when she passed away and to be with dad for support and love. These are the best things I have done, just to have her know that I loved her and I truly did.
For those of you who knew Mom, you knew she was feisty and spoke her mind, I am so thankful to have gotten those qualities from her. She was always about her family and that meant more to her than any material item ever could. She loved people and animals equally and those were her favorite and most cherished things in life. Unfortunately her family was not under the same thought. my brother and sisters were not there the last two years and for this I will never forgive them. Ever since Brads death they have not spoken to my Mother or Father or me! they will have to live with that for the rest of their lives.
The saddest thing about all of this is, the Saturday night before Mom passed I had convinced her to phone James and Cheryl and Charlene and let them know that she was ill with cancer again, we never got the chance to phone them.
When I did phone them on the Sunday to let them know Mom had passed away, it suddenly became about them and how Mom had not spoke to them for two years, last I checked they all had phones, but the worst thing was Cheryl and James would not even take time off work to come see dad, or to help with any arrangements or anything. I can not believe I am even related to these people some days.
My greatest support was my Aunt Vera and moms dear friend Kelly. I had so much to do, which included dealing with the coroner that day and then making all arrangements for moms cremation, writing and paying for obituary, packing up the entire house and helping to put everything in storage and also helping to get dad settled with my nephew Kory, who was helpful in moving stuff out of the house, and has been looking after Dad since Moms passing and getting him back and forth to Dialysis 3 days a week.
Mom was a truly loving person and a fabulous mother, always supportive of me and helpful in every way she could. Giving me advice at all points in my life and just calling to say hi. I miss all these things and wish I could get just one more day to tell her how much she meant and do more for her.
Life will go on for me, though I am not sure how somedays, nothing has hit me yet and I am still feeling very numb and just miss her every minute.
She was beautiful and a great lady, and her life was far too short here. She will be missed a great deal and will now be with her son Bradley, her little brother Ron and her parents. I love you Mom and miss you always. Life will never be the same, and will never get better but it will be good and different. Know always you were the most influential person in my life and that I love you so much and always will.
Friday, May 16, 2014
May Long Weekend
Well it has been a while since I have written anything again and have not been as disciplined with this blog as I use to be. We have just been so crazy busy over the last couple years and there is so much going on in our lives and time just seems to get away.
For this week we have been putting up our new fence and getting that into place, It is so nice to have privacy and not be looking at the pile of garbage which has been in the neighbors yard for the last two years since we bought the house, also all the old pieces of tree laying around his back yard are just an eyesore. Hoping to get the last few posts in today and then build the gates and get them up as well.
Sunday we are having a BBQ and we have over 20 people coming for dinner, should be a great time and really busy, love having our little parties and making lots of yummy food for all our friends and family, by family I do mean Matts relatives that are here in Ontario and our friends who have become family.
I wish Matts parents were closer and also wish my Mom and Dad were closer so they could come and see us and we could help them more. It is so hard as your parents get older and especially if you are a fair distance from them and their lives are not as healthy as they use to be. Hate the constant stress of worrying about the four of them.
Anyhow, back to the few things we have been doing as of the last month, as I said we are putting up a new fence and then doing some curtains around the deck and getting the whole privacy thing into action, hate it when I just want to sit alone and have a coffee and a cigarette and all the neighbors can se me. Sometimes you just want to close off the world and not have to be nice to anyone at all.
You all know what I mean and am sure most of you feel the same way some days.
World Pride is coming the end of June and I am looking so forward to it and to just having fun for a week and not worrying about fuck all or anyone. It should be huge and a great time for all and will be one of the largest Prides Toronto has ever seen. Looking forward to all the people , the crowds and all the fun we are going to have this year.
Soon after Pride we have our third wedding anniversary, yes we have been married for three years this July and together for over five, been a great ride with a few ups and downs, just like everyone else I am sure.
Today we are back to work this afternoon to finish the fence and then tomorrow clean the house and get some food prepped for Sunday. Hope you all have a great long weekend and get to spend it with someone who makes you smile. Peace out and thanks for reading.
For this week we have been putting up our new fence and getting that into place, It is so nice to have privacy and not be looking at the pile of garbage which has been in the neighbors yard for the last two years since we bought the house, also all the old pieces of tree laying around his back yard are just an eyesore. Hoping to get the last few posts in today and then build the gates and get them up as well.
Sunday we are having a BBQ and we have over 20 people coming for dinner, should be a great time and really busy, love having our little parties and making lots of yummy food for all our friends and family, by family I do mean Matts relatives that are here in Ontario and our friends who have become family.
I wish Matts parents were closer and also wish my Mom and Dad were closer so they could come and see us and we could help them more. It is so hard as your parents get older and especially if you are a fair distance from them and their lives are not as healthy as they use to be. Hate the constant stress of worrying about the four of them.
Anyhow, back to the few things we have been doing as of the last month, as I said we are putting up a new fence and then doing some curtains around the deck and getting the whole privacy thing into action, hate it when I just want to sit alone and have a coffee and a cigarette and all the neighbors can se me. Sometimes you just want to close off the world and not have to be nice to anyone at all.
You all know what I mean and am sure most of you feel the same way some days.
World Pride is coming the end of June and I am looking so forward to it and to just having fun for a week and not worrying about fuck all or anyone. It should be huge and a great time for all and will be one of the largest Prides Toronto has ever seen. Looking forward to all the people , the crowds and all the fun we are going to have this year.
Soon after Pride we have our third wedding anniversary, yes we have been married for three years this July and together for over five, been a great ride with a few ups and downs, just like everyone else I am sure.
Today we are back to work this afternoon to finish the fence and then tomorrow clean the house and get some food prepped for Sunday. Hope you all have a great long weekend and get to spend it with someone who makes you smile. Peace out and thanks for reading.
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Catching Up
Well here goes again, trying to catch you all up on our lives here in Toronto. I have been very bad with writing lately and really need to get back into this because it is very therapeutic for me and for our lives.
So here goes on what has been going on with us for the last couple months here in Toronto. We went back to Cuba at the end of March and had another holiday, get away and escape from reality, we met our friends Michel and Richard down there again and had a great time, so much fun. We went back to Havana and got to see our favorite staff and also met some new people from here in Toronto. It was just the stress relieve I needed and also Matt needed as we have had stresses in our lives which I am going to keep private for now.
The house is done and looking great and since we got back we have regarded the entire back yard, sectioned off the garden and created a new paver patio off our back deck. We have also dead headed all the plants from last winter which was just too long and had not too much for warm weather here as of yet., the flower beds have all been weeded, raked and cleaned for spring.
Also in the last couple months we got new living room furniture in a really nice white color, given to us from a friend. Much appreciated and it looks great. Also got a new antique dining room table which is gorgeous and I just have to do a bit of refinishing work on it. Next big thing that we have to do is put up our fence and create some privacy for us and that way we can sit in the back yard without having to be disturbed if we please. A bit of private time is always nice when you live in a city where houses are so close to each other.
Started many seeds already such as Tomato and certain flowers and herbs so we will have a few things to enjoy by early summer. I am so excited for gardening season to be among us again. I love getting it done and working out there as I find it so relaxing and fabulous and very rewarding.
Been very stressed about my parents and them being so far out of town and with the long winter and harsh weather Alberta had this year , it is even more troublesome to me and I am sure to them as well.
With Dad having to go into town three days a week for dialysis and Mom having to try and drive him, it is stressful as I worry about them a lot and am not there to help them as much as I would like to be. It is always hard when your parents get older and they need you more. We are going through this with both Matt and my parents at this time.
Last weekend we went to a funeral for a friends brother, I know what it is like to lose a brother who you loved so much and was happy that we could be there to support her as many of my friends were there when we lost Bradley, can't believe it has been almost two years. Still miss him every day of my life.
I knew getting older was never going to be easy and I knew that I would experience loss in my life but was not and am not prepared fro any more at this time or in the near future. I really hate death and am thankful for a supportive husband and great friends, and a loving Mom and Dad. Too bad about the rest of my family and how big of losers they all are, yes I am talking siblings ad inlaws and nephews and nieces. No worries I have a better family now and it is people who have chosen to have me in their lives as well as me having them in ours. You know who you are.
So in closing I will really try and get on here more and do my due diligence in keeping this up, not just for you but for me as well. Take care and may spring bring joy and happiness to all my friends.
So here goes on what has been going on with us for the last couple months here in Toronto. We went back to Cuba at the end of March and had another holiday, get away and escape from reality, we met our friends Michel and Richard down there again and had a great time, so much fun. We went back to Havana and got to see our favorite staff and also met some new people from here in Toronto. It was just the stress relieve I needed and also Matt needed as we have had stresses in our lives which I am going to keep private for now.
The house is done and looking great and since we got back we have regarded the entire back yard, sectioned off the garden and created a new paver patio off our back deck. We have also dead headed all the plants from last winter which was just too long and had not too much for warm weather here as of yet., the flower beds have all been weeded, raked and cleaned for spring.
Also in the last couple months we got new living room furniture in a really nice white color, given to us from a friend. Much appreciated and it looks great. Also got a new antique dining room table which is gorgeous and I just have to do a bit of refinishing work on it. Next big thing that we have to do is put up our fence and create some privacy for us and that way we can sit in the back yard without having to be disturbed if we please. A bit of private time is always nice when you live in a city where houses are so close to each other.
Started many seeds already such as Tomato and certain flowers and herbs so we will have a few things to enjoy by early summer. I am so excited for gardening season to be among us again. I love getting it done and working out there as I find it so relaxing and fabulous and very rewarding.
Been very stressed about my parents and them being so far out of town and with the long winter and harsh weather Alberta had this year , it is even more troublesome to me and I am sure to them as well.
With Dad having to go into town three days a week for dialysis and Mom having to try and drive him, it is stressful as I worry about them a lot and am not there to help them as much as I would like to be. It is always hard when your parents get older and they need you more. We are going through this with both Matt and my parents at this time.
Last weekend we went to a funeral for a friends brother, I know what it is like to lose a brother who you loved so much and was happy that we could be there to support her as many of my friends were there when we lost Bradley, can't believe it has been almost two years. Still miss him every day of my life.
I knew getting older was never going to be easy and I knew that I would experience loss in my life but was not and am not prepared fro any more at this time or in the near future. I really hate death and am thankful for a supportive husband and great friends, and a loving Mom and Dad. Too bad about the rest of my family and how big of losers they all are, yes I am talking siblings ad inlaws and nephews and nieces. No worries I have a better family now and it is people who have chosen to have me in their lives as well as me having them in ours. You know who you are.
So in closing I will really try and get on here more and do my due diligence in keeping this up, not just for you but for me as well. Take care and may spring bring joy and happiness to all my friends.
Friday, February 28, 2014
A little stressed
Well anyone who knows me knows this is truly an understatement and I am always more than a little stressed and always worry about someone, something and put all others before myself always. I thrive on stress most days and this is how I have been successful in the hospitality industry. Though some stresses I can seriously do with out as we all can, these stresses are the lost of a loved one, health issues for you or someone close to you. These two seem to be my largest stresses of the last couple years and I just hate it.
I am now stressed over a great loved one and am so afraid of losing them, and am not sure I will ever be ready to do so. I am talking of course of my parents as they are a part of whatever small and fabulous little bit of family I have left in my life. The family I choose to have in my life, Matt, my parents, and his parents, and a few cousins and some very dear friends. I like this new family concept and have adapted very well to it.
As your parents get older it gets harder and we are at the age now where we are losing parents and friends parents so often, it is a never ending circle and I hate it. I am not happy that over the last year I did not realize how important your parents are to you and this shall be the one regret I have for the rest of my life, though we all have regret and we live with it.
I love my parents unconditionally and always will, even if I go for a period of time when I do not see them, I miss them and talk to them as often as possible.
As many of you know my mother went through and is now in remission from cancer and has been free and clear of all cancer now for 3 years, thankfully and fingers crossed she will stay this way. Mom and I are and have always been very close and I can not imagine my life without her in it. She is and will always be my best friend no matter what happens or what we go through or how long we go without seeing each other. I love my mommy.
My father and I, although we have had a tough time of it at some points in my life, and he did not deal too well with the whole me being gay for the first few years, we have grown closer and are getting along quite well and it is nice to have them both in my life at this time. My father has been going through kidney dialysis now for two years and we almost lost him on New Years of 2012 which I am so thankful that we didn't. I can not imagine life without both my parents for me and also for them. The have been married for 52 years this year and not many people can say that!
Anyhow just thought I should say I love my mom and dad and to all those who have lost your parents, I feel for you and can not imagine what it is like not to be able to call and talk to them when you want to.
I am now stressed over a great loved one and am so afraid of losing them, and am not sure I will ever be ready to do so. I am talking of course of my parents as they are a part of whatever small and fabulous little bit of family I have left in my life. The family I choose to have in my life, Matt, my parents, and his parents, and a few cousins and some very dear friends. I like this new family concept and have adapted very well to it.
As your parents get older it gets harder and we are at the age now where we are losing parents and friends parents so often, it is a never ending circle and I hate it. I am not happy that over the last year I did not realize how important your parents are to you and this shall be the one regret I have for the rest of my life, though we all have regret and we live with it.
I love my parents unconditionally and always will, even if I go for a period of time when I do not see them, I miss them and talk to them as often as possible.
As many of you know my mother went through and is now in remission from cancer and has been free and clear of all cancer now for 3 years, thankfully and fingers crossed she will stay this way. Mom and I are and have always been very close and I can not imagine my life without her in it. She is and will always be my best friend no matter what happens or what we go through or how long we go without seeing each other. I love my mommy.
My father and I, although we have had a tough time of it at some points in my life, and he did not deal too well with the whole me being gay for the first few years, we have grown closer and are getting along quite well and it is nice to have them both in my life at this time. My father has been going through kidney dialysis now for two years and we almost lost him on New Years of 2012 which I am so thankful that we didn't. I can not imagine life without both my parents for me and also for them. The have been married for 52 years this year and not many people can say that!
Anyhow just thought I should say I love my mom and dad and to all those who have lost your parents, I feel for you and can not imagine what it is like not to be able to call and talk to them when you want to.
Seriously
This winter has been hell and I mean this in every way, the never ending snow and cold and ice, has been trying on my body and mind and I am just seriously tired of this shit.
It needs to end and it needed to ended a week ago. We are now at the last day of February and Toronto is under an extreme cold alert, WTF?
It is just hard to get out of bed and want to do anything this year and I have really been suffering for the first time in my life of depression due to this damn weather and long and overdrawn winter. With this winter we had ice storms, snow storms, extreme cold weather and power outages, it has sucked in every way possible and really put me in a sour mood.
I can honestly say I am not a happy camper and can not wait for spring, it has even been too cold to go downtown for the most part. We have not even seen Wayne since we got back from Cuba, weird! The cold and snow have kept all in doors and barely even see the neighbors or anyone out at all. Really sucks.
My body is just no longer suited for these long winters and horribly cold days, yes as a skinny white boy I do not do well in the cold at all, you may consider this whining, I will call it venting for the time being.
All I can say is bring on spring so I can get to work on our yard and get the garden turned and get shit done. been drawing up plans for the back flower beds and things that we can do out front and make things beautiful, we have also discussed putting up our fence and which type we are looking at. Will be so nice to have privacy in our back yard and a gate across the front to stop unwanted visitors. yes I said it, sometimes we just want to sit and relax in our yard by ourselves without someone walking down the drive to bug for something or another.
On the bright side of this winter the main floor is finally complete and done, all that is left in the house is to fix up the paint on the ceiling upstairs and stain and varnish the stairs, I can't wait to get all this done and then we can just enjoy it for a while and love what we have completed and done on our own. We now have a beautiful home and a great life in our little house.
Things have come together quite nice and I have to say we did an amazing fucking job here and are very proud of ourselves, yes that was a pat on the back, because sometimes you just have to pat yourself on the back and say a job well done.
Time to get sett for party season, and by this I mean almost 2 years in our house and party coming up soon, Need to have that long overdue housewarming party that we have never had. Ya bitches we are going to get down and have some fun this spring, summer and fall, hope you all are as well.
Anyways back to the cold and out for a smoke now. Got to love standing outside in minus 25 weather and smoking a great Cuban cigarette.
Have a great weekend and here is hoping that March will come in like a Lion and go out like a Lamb and do it quietly and quickly, the sooner we get some plus temperatures the happier we will all be.
It needs to end and it needed to ended a week ago. We are now at the last day of February and Toronto is under an extreme cold alert, WTF?
It is just hard to get out of bed and want to do anything this year and I have really been suffering for the first time in my life of depression due to this damn weather and long and overdrawn winter. With this winter we had ice storms, snow storms, extreme cold weather and power outages, it has sucked in every way possible and really put me in a sour mood.
I can honestly say I am not a happy camper and can not wait for spring, it has even been too cold to go downtown for the most part. We have not even seen Wayne since we got back from Cuba, weird! The cold and snow have kept all in doors and barely even see the neighbors or anyone out at all. Really sucks.
My body is just no longer suited for these long winters and horribly cold days, yes as a skinny white boy I do not do well in the cold at all, you may consider this whining, I will call it venting for the time being.
All I can say is bring on spring so I can get to work on our yard and get the garden turned and get shit done. been drawing up plans for the back flower beds and things that we can do out front and make things beautiful, we have also discussed putting up our fence and which type we are looking at. Will be so nice to have privacy in our back yard and a gate across the front to stop unwanted visitors. yes I said it, sometimes we just want to sit and relax in our yard by ourselves without someone walking down the drive to bug for something or another.
On the bright side of this winter the main floor is finally complete and done, all that is left in the house is to fix up the paint on the ceiling upstairs and stain and varnish the stairs, I can't wait to get all this done and then we can just enjoy it for a while and love what we have completed and done on our own. We now have a beautiful home and a great life in our little house.
Things have come together quite nice and I have to say we did an amazing fucking job here and are very proud of ourselves, yes that was a pat on the back, because sometimes you just have to pat yourself on the back and say a job well done.
Time to get sett for party season, and by this I mean almost 2 years in our house and party coming up soon, Need to have that long overdue housewarming party that we have never had. Ya bitches we are going to get down and have some fun this spring, summer and fall, hope you all are as well.
Anyways back to the cold and out for a smoke now. Got to love standing outside in minus 25 weather and smoking a great Cuban cigarette.
Have a great weekend and here is hoping that March will come in like a Lion and go out like a Lamb and do it quietly and quickly, the sooner we get some plus temperatures the happier we will all be.
Sunday, February 9, 2014
Ouch
Well it has been a week and that is about all, this winter is really getting to me and the snow and cold is just depressing after a little while. Since we arrived back from Cuba, we have had nothing but snow and cold here in Toronto.
I slipped down a couple stairs in the house the other morning when I got up and my hip is now really sore. I am not sure what I did, but this is hell.
I also slipped the other day on the bus on my way to a job interview, yes I finally got an interview after all this time, I actually think it went very well, though you never know. I am also going to be starting my own business soon and if I get this job I will have to figure out how to balance the both of them and get my shit together quickly.
Matt and I are doing good and the house is really almost done, what a feeling, we had someone in the other day to check out replacing clay pipe in the basement and when we do this we want to also consider taking the depth of the basement down another foot so we have a good enough height to finish the basement and add another bedroom down there.
I have been layed up on the couch now for 2 days and walking is really hard, I hate this pain and not being able to do anything is a real pain in the ass for me. I need to be on the go and doing stuff all the time.
So I am hoping that I can get back in my feet soon and this is a litteral statement as I am so sore and even had a hard time sleeping last night and have actually had a hard time sleeping the last week, it has really hit me this winter and the only redeeming factor is the sun that is still out every day. At least we have that here, which is better than anywhere else I have ever lived.
I miss Cuba and being on a holiday and carefree, It was so nice to just sit on the beach or poolside and I can see myself doing this all the time and going to Barbados, Cuba and Mexico when we can afford to do so. I just loved it!
Speaking of Cuba, Mara and Jeff have jetted off there for the week, seems to be the holiday choice of our neighborhood, I think a great many of us have all gone down there this year to escape the winter we have had.
Well it time for me to go and sit on the stairs and try to get some painting done, then maybe tomorrow I will go through some clothes again and get that done as well as I am hoping I got my job and will be going to work this week .
Anyways I hope you all had a great weekend and I will see you again soon, I know my writing today was very scattered and all over the place but I just write as it comes out. That is all!
I slipped down a couple stairs in the house the other morning when I got up and my hip is now really sore. I am not sure what I did, but this is hell.
I also slipped the other day on the bus on my way to a job interview, yes I finally got an interview after all this time, I actually think it went very well, though you never know. I am also going to be starting my own business soon and if I get this job I will have to figure out how to balance the both of them and get my shit together quickly.
Matt and I are doing good and the house is really almost done, what a feeling, we had someone in the other day to check out replacing clay pipe in the basement and when we do this we want to also consider taking the depth of the basement down another foot so we have a good enough height to finish the basement and add another bedroom down there.
I have been layed up on the couch now for 2 days and walking is really hard, I hate this pain and not being able to do anything is a real pain in the ass for me. I need to be on the go and doing stuff all the time.
So I am hoping that I can get back in my feet soon and this is a litteral statement as I am so sore and even had a hard time sleeping last night and have actually had a hard time sleeping the last week, it has really hit me this winter and the only redeeming factor is the sun that is still out every day. At least we have that here, which is better than anywhere else I have ever lived.
I miss Cuba and being on a holiday and carefree, It was so nice to just sit on the beach or poolside and I can see myself doing this all the time and going to Barbados, Cuba and Mexico when we can afford to do so. I just loved it!
Speaking of Cuba, Mara and Jeff have jetted off there for the week, seems to be the holiday choice of our neighborhood, I think a great many of us have all gone down there this year to escape the winter we have had.
Well it time for me to go and sit on the stairs and try to get some painting done, then maybe tomorrow I will go through some clothes again and get that done as well as I am hoping I got my job and will be going to work this week .
Anyways I hope you all had a great weekend and I will see you again soon, I know my writing today was very scattered and all over the place but I just write as it comes out. That is all!
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Almost done our little house
Well folks the time is nearing and we are almost done our renovations, since we arrived back home we have sanded the dry wall in the back porch, painted back there, started the railing and hung up and organized what needed to be done.
I have finished the treatment in the bathroom up stairs and we have cleaned the house from top to bottom, scrubbing all ornaments, cleaning every service in the house, washing all the windows and pictures and only a few things left to do.
Have to stain the stair treads, base boards, and window trim and door trim in the back porch. touch up some of the paint in the house and then we are done and all complete.
After all is done it will have been close to two years since we bought the house , moved in and gutted and started working on things here. And it has all been worth it in so many ways, now it is time to get back to reality, but not until after we have one kick ass huge house warming party to celebrate our achievements here and enjoy our work.
Next summer we want to put up a fence around the back yard and get things done back there, do a draped patio and have a look at the basement to see what can be done down there.
We love our home and plan to be here a while, well that is unless someone comes by and offers us a price in which we just can't refuse, then we might have to consider selling and moving to a new project but not yet.
So not a whole lot else to report today, wishing you all a great February and a lovely week, thanks for reading and talk to you soon.
I have finished the treatment in the bathroom up stairs and we have cleaned the house from top to bottom, scrubbing all ornaments, cleaning every service in the house, washing all the windows and pictures and only a few things left to do.
Have to stain the stair treads, base boards, and window trim and door trim in the back porch. touch up some of the paint in the house and then we are done and all complete.
After all is done it will have been close to two years since we bought the house , moved in and gutted and started working on things here. And it has all been worth it in so many ways, now it is time to get back to reality, but not until after we have one kick ass huge house warming party to celebrate our achievements here and enjoy our work.
Next summer we want to put up a fence around the back yard and get things done back there, do a draped patio and have a look at the basement to see what can be done down there.
We love our home and plan to be here a while, well that is unless someone comes by and offers us a price in which we just can't refuse, then we might have to consider selling and moving to a new project but not yet.
So not a whole lot else to report today, wishing you all a great February and a lovely week, thanks for reading and talk to you soon.
Our Holiday
Well we finally did it and took a holiday for the first time in our marriage and life together. Matt and I went to Cuba for 7 days on January 9th and I have to say I have been chomping at the bit to go back since we got home. it was so amazing!
To be honest when we were talking about a holiday, Cuba was the furthest from my desired location to go and visit, but I am sure glad I got over that and took the plunge and went because I don't think it would have been as great anywhere else in the world.
We stayed just out side of Havana Cuba in this quaint and older apartment style hotel, with a large pick of restaurants and few bars right at the resort, all was good, and you cross the road to be on the beach and a swim in the ocean. If we didn't feel like going to the ocean we got to sit poolside, pick up a litre of vodka for $4 and drink all day out of it. Great, then a short stumble for lunch and grab a large pizza for $3, what a great life, and the real bonus for me was I could smoke anywhere and everywhere I wanted to , no freezing your ass off outside.
And the people down there are all so friendly and hard working, a totally different outlook on life than we as Canadians have.
We also met many great people within the resort from different areas of Canada and had a great time with all of them as well, but I have to say my two favorites were Michel and Richard from Sherbrook Quebec, a couple of amazing and fun loving guys, was so nice to hang out with them and visit and just have a great time.
We also met a couple from Windsor who were just a blast, Veronica and Gunther and his very sweet mother, Matt went to an authentic Cuban dance and show with them one night in Havana.
Our favorite waitress there was named Julie and she was just fabulous and an amazing young woman, and so beautiful and sweet, I cant imagine anyone in the world not liking her. Then are favorite bartender was Danier, sweet and also a real looker and just a charmer in every way. For the most part all the staff were amazing and we just had a great time.
We were inspired to go by the price we got, we were wanting to stay for the beauty and the fabulous views, people and food, and ocean and pools.
I check online everyday to see if there is another special and we can go back, I would totally honestly move there if we could, I just loved it.
We have decided to make this a yearly trip and will try to plan it with Michel and Richard and hopefully can drag Jeff and Mara with us next year and have one hell of a party in Cuba with all of our friends, old and new.
So my advice to you now that we have been to Havana, is go and if you do, stay for 2 weeks not one, because it will leave you wanting more. Enjoy and thanks for reading.
To be honest when we were talking about a holiday, Cuba was the furthest from my desired location to go and visit, but I am sure glad I got over that and took the plunge and went because I don't think it would have been as great anywhere else in the world.
We stayed just out side of Havana Cuba in this quaint and older apartment style hotel, with a large pick of restaurants and few bars right at the resort, all was good, and you cross the road to be on the beach and a swim in the ocean. If we didn't feel like going to the ocean we got to sit poolside, pick up a litre of vodka for $4 and drink all day out of it. Great, then a short stumble for lunch and grab a large pizza for $3, what a great life, and the real bonus for me was I could smoke anywhere and everywhere I wanted to , no freezing your ass off outside.
And the people down there are all so friendly and hard working, a totally different outlook on life than we as Canadians have.
We also met many great people within the resort from different areas of Canada and had a great time with all of them as well, but I have to say my two favorites were Michel and Richard from Sherbrook Quebec, a couple of amazing and fun loving guys, was so nice to hang out with them and visit and just have a great time.
We also met a couple from Windsor who were just a blast, Veronica and Gunther and his very sweet mother, Matt went to an authentic Cuban dance and show with them one night in Havana.
Our favorite waitress there was named Julie and she was just fabulous and an amazing young woman, and so beautiful and sweet, I cant imagine anyone in the world not liking her. Then are favorite bartender was Danier, sweet and also a real looker and just a charmer in every way. For the most part all the staff were amazing and we just had a great time.
We were inspired to go by the price we got, we were wanting to stay for the beauty and the fabulous views, people and food, and ocean and pools.
I check online everyday to see if there is another special and we can go back, I would totally honestly move there if we could, I just loved it.
We have decided to make this a yearly trip and will try to plan it with Michel and Richard and hopefully can drag Jeff and Mara with us next year and have one hell of a party in Cuba with all of our friends, old and new.
So my advice to you now that we have been to Havana, is go and if you do, stay for 2 weeks not one, because it will leave you wanting more. Enjoy and thanks for reading.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Letter to Kathleen Wynne
Dear Miss Kathleen Wynne
I was so happy when you were first appointed as Premiere of Ontario and head of the liberal party here, but must say I am no longer.
I wrote to you last week and expected some sort of response in regards to gift cards and the ice storm, but I guess I do not fall in to a category of any importance to you or your party. I have also phoned the Canada works offices offering these gift cards and they told me it is first come , first serve and I have to line up before 8am, while this is fine and great, I must say I am disappointed in the way the province and the city is handling the distribution of these cards, why were they not just mailed out to the areas affected by the storm. You know damn well being without power for more than a day , that we lost food.
I can not line up and wait for a card as I am not well enough to do so every day. So I guess being forced from my home, losing food and having to eat out for 3 days holds little to no importance to you and the Liberal party.
I guess you got your 15 minutes on Tv the other day and handing out a few groceries and being appreciated with that , though I never saw you , neither did anyone in my neighborhood.
Your response is and will be more than welcome but I will not hold my breath as this is the second email I have sent now in the last week. All I can say is my vote was and has always been liberal but will now probably go towards the NDP.
With regards , awaiting your response
I was so happy when you were first appointed as Premiere of Ontario and head of the liberal party here, but must say I am no longer.
I wrote to you last week and expected some sort of response in regards to gift cards and the ice storm, but I guess I do not fall in to a category of any importance to you or your party. I have also phoned the Canada works offices offering these gift cards and they told me it is first come , first serve and I have to line up before 8am, while this is fine and great, I must say I am disappointed in the way the province and the city is handling the distribution of these cards, why were they not just mailed out to the areas affected by the storm. You know damn well being without power for more than a day , that we lost food.
I can not line up and wait for a card as I am not well enough to do so every day. So I guess being forced from my home, losing food and having to eat out for 3 days holds little to no importance to you and the Liberal party.
I guess you got your 15 minutes on Tv the other day and handing out a few groceries and being appreciated with that , though I never saw you , neither did anyone in my neighborhood.
Your response is and will be more than welcome but I will not hold my breath as this is the second email I have sent now in the last week. All I can say is my vote was and has always been liberal but will now probably go towards the NDP.
With regards , awaiting your response
My letter to Harper today
I am not sure I have selected the right category but am writing you in a letter of importance to myself. I watch TV daily and am so tired of seeing commercials saying our country of Canada giving money to the Phillipines. I think we need to be offering money and help to people who involved in the ice storm in Toronto and Ontario and lost power and were forced from their homes at Christmas. I am one of those people and have not received any word of compensation or seen any thing on TV offering to help us. We live on a fixed income as do many people in our area. We had to get a hotel, eat our meals out and leave our home.
I must say I am a little disappointed how our country is looking after other countries before we look after our own. This to me has always been a problem. I have also sent a letter to the Premier of Ontario with no response at this time.
It also makes me a bit angry being originally from Alberta and seeing the suffering these people went through in southern Alberta with little to no help at all. This really sickens me that you as a government representing our Country are helping other countries more than we help ourselves, we should be cleaning our own back step before others.
While I am on this subject why not increase Old age pension and Canada Pension plan instead of making our seniors starve and have to budget as they do. I believe this is ridiculous and what we do for other countries such as the Phillipines is great but please help us Canadians first.
I hope I get a response from you, but am doubtful.
I do know though with the lack of response from Katherine Wynne and the liberal party and quite frankly never liking the Conservative party believes my vote in the next election will definitely be going towards NDP.
Thank you so much and have a great day, I am hoping to get some sort of response from you or a member of your government.
I must say I am a little disappointed how our country is looking after other countries before we look after our own. This to me has always been a problem. I have also sent a letter to the Premier of Ontario with no response at this time.
It also makes me a bit angry being originally from Alberta and seeing the suffering these people went through in southern Alberta with little to no help at all. This really sickens me that you as a government representing our Country are helping other countries more than we help ourselves, we should be cleaning our own back step before others.
While I am on this subject why not increase Old age pension and Canada Pension plan instead of making our seniors starve and have to budget as they do. I believe this is ridiculous and what we do for other countries such as the Phillipines is great but please help us Canadians first.
I hope I get a response from you, but am doubtful.
I do know though with the lack of response from Katherine Wynne and the liberal party and quite frankly never liking the Conservative party believes my vote in the next election will definitely be going towards NDP.
Thank you so much and have a great day, I am hoping to get some sort of response from you or a member of your government.
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
November in a Nutshell, and a Disaster December
Well here it is , again I apologize for not writing sweet fuck all for the past little while. I have been and remain extremely busy doing the last few little bits in our house and looking for work and shit.
So in November for the first three weeks Matt and I worked our butts off to get the back porch framed reinsulated, tiled and the new bathroom laid out back there. We did plumbing, electrical and in preparation to put in a powder room , built in pantry and move our laundry to the main floor.
Then on the night of the 25th of November I flew out to Alberta and spent a fabulous week with my parents, It was so great to spend some valuable time with Mom and Dad and celebrate Moms 67th birthday with them both. I am so lucky to have both my parents and be able to spend time with them and considering they are the last immediate family I have left or choose to speak to, this was incredibly valuable to me and was worth millions.
We had a blast while I was out there and it was just so much fun, no pressure to see any of my drunken siblings or self righteous nephews and nieces, just a good time for Mom and Dad and I and a great visit.
Got to also stop by and see my best galpal and meet her hubby and the twins for a night before going to the Airport to come back here. Love you lots Sandi and so enjoyed our visit and meeting Tom and the twins, you have the most amazing little family and fabulous husband and you my dear are still the most gorgeous and loving person I know.
Anyhow while I was away Matt got sick and had a lovely cold and flu, was so hot to come home to that and catch from him, not really.
Anyways we finally both got over our flu by the first week of December and got on with the back porch and finishing drywall, mudding, taping and tiling the floors, had to have heat ran back there as well, got a good friend of ours Adam in to run new Duct work, so nice back there now.
We now have it all mudded the wall is tiled in the powder room and windows are frosted and washer and dryer moved up, I tell you that is the best thing, not having to walk to the basement anymore to do laundry. Love it.
We also went to see Les Miserable on December 21st, this was a Christmas gift to Matt and we both enjoyed the show and had a great time, it was amazing and if it comes to a city near you soon, go and see it, the best. However that night continued on for quite some time we went out after so Matt could meet my friend Billy who I have not seen since 2008. Was a great night until we got home in our cab and the damn power was out, woke up the next morning Sunday and was hopeful but there was no power, we kept ourselves warm with the gas stove and in bed all damn day. On Monday the 23rd we finally gave up hope and went to a hotel with the kids for a night, Tuesday I came home to check on things and grab some stuff we needed, wasn't even an hour after I left the house to go back to the hotel and Mara called to say the power was back on.
Got back to the house late afternoon on the 24th, checked a couple of the neighbors house to make sure furnaces were all running and water pipes were good. So glad we got to come home and spend Christmas here. Mara and Jeff and Louisa came over on Christmas eve for a visit and I have to say not too impressed with one of them. All and all a good time except for the racist and sexist remarks.
Anyhow it did not ruin our fun.
Christmas was spent with my hubby Matt who bought me the best gift ever a gorgeous and warm jacket, he also slaved over the stove all day and made a fabulous turkey dinner and we had Jeff and Mara and their two fab daughters over for dinner. After all Christmas is suppose to be spent with family and they are our family here.
New Years eve we were suppose to go out, though that was spoiled too when I slipped on black ice the night before and screwed the whole left side of my body, so not fun. Matt and I stayed home, had a few drinks and saw in the New Year with my new sis and bro, Mara and Jeff. Had a great time as always, love you guys.
Okay that is all for now, I hope 2014 is amazing for all my friends and adopted family and my parents. Lets make it a great year and remember the good and bad from 2013 as this is how we learn and move on.
So in November for the first three weeks Matt and I worked our butts off to get the back porch framed reinsulated, tiled and the new bathroom laid out back there. We did plumbing, electrical and in preparation to put in a powder room , built in pantry and move our laundry to the main floor.
Then on the night of the 25th of November I flew out to Alberta and spent a fabulous week with my parents, It was so great to spend some valuable time with Mom and Dad and celebrate Moms 67th birthday with them both. I am so lucky to have both my parents and be able to spend time with them and considering they are the last immediate family I have left or choose to speak to, this was incredibly valuable to me and was worth millions.
We had a blast while I was out there and it was just so much fun, no pressure to see any of my drunken siblings or self righteous nephews and nieces, just a good time for Mom and Dad and I and a great visit.
Got to also stop by and see my best galpal and meet her hubby and the twins for a night before going to the Airport to come back here. Love you lots Sandi and so enjoyed our visit and meeting Tom and the twins, you have the most amazing little family and fabulous husband and you my dear are still the most gorgeous and loving person I know.
Anyhow while I was away Matt got sick and had a lovely cold and flu, was so hot to come home to that and catch from him, not really.
Anyways we finally both got over our flu by the first week of December and got on with the back porch and finishing drywall, mudding, taping and tiling the floors, had to have heat ran back there as well, got a good friend of ours Adam in to run new Duct work, so nice back there now.
We now have it all mudded the wall is tiled in the powder room and windows are frosted and washer and dryer moved up, I tell you that is the best thing, not having to walk to the basement anymore to do laundry. Love it.
We also went to see Les Miserable on December 21st, this was a Christmas gift to Matt and we both enjoyed the show and had a great time, it was amazing and if it comes to a city near you soon, go and see it, the best. However that night continued on for quite some time we went out after so Matt could meet my friend Billy who I have not seen since 2008. Was a great night until we got home in our cab and the damn power was out, woke up the next morning Sunday and was hopeful but there was no power, we kept ourselves warm with the gas stove and in bed all damn day. On Monday the 23rd we finally gave up hope and went to a hotel with the kids for a night, Tuesday I came home to check on things and grab some stuff we needed, wasn't even an hour after I left the house to go back to the hotel and Mara called to say the power was back on.
Got back to the house late afternoon on the 24th, checked a couple of the neighbors house to make sure furnaces were all running and water pipes were good. So glad we got to come home and spend Christmas here. Mara and Jeff and Louisa came over on Christmas eve for a visit and I have to say not too impressed with one of them. All and all a good time except for the racist and sexist remarks.
Anyhow it did not ruin our fun.
Christmas was spent with my hubby Matt who bought me the best gift ever a gorgeous and warm jacket, he also slaved over the stove all day and made a fabulous turkey dinner and we had Jeff and Mara and their two fab daughters over for dinner. After all Christmas is suppose to be spent with family and they are our family here.
New Years eve we were suppose to go out, though that was spoiled too when I slipped on black ice the night before and screwed the whole left side of my body, so not fun. Matt and I stayed home, had a few drinks and saw in the New Year with my new sis and bro, Mara and Jeff. Had a great time as always, love you guys.
Okay that is all for now, I hope 2014 is amazing for all my friends and adopted family and my parents. Lets make it a great year and remember the good and bad from 2013 as this is how we learn and move on.
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