Well anyone who knows me knows this is truly an understatement and I am always more than a little stressed and always worry about someone, something and put all others before myself always. I thrive on stress most days and this is how I have been successful in the hospitality industry. Though some stresses I can seriously do with out as we all can, these stresses are the lost of a loved one, health issues for you or someone close to you. These two seem to be my largest stresses of the last couple years and I just hate it.
I am now stressed over a great loved one and am so afraid of losing them, and am not sure I will ever be ready to do so. I am talking of course of my parents as they are a part of whatever small and fabulous little bit of family I have left in my life. The family I choose to have in my life, Matt, my parents, and his parents, and a few cousins and some very dear friends. I like this new family concept and have adapted very well to it.
As your parents get older it gets harder and we are at the age now where we are losing parents and friends parents so often, it is a never ending circle and I hate it. I am not happy that over the last year I did not realize how important your parents are to you and this shall be the one regret I have for the rest of my life, though we all have regret and we live with it.
I love my parents unconditionally and always will, even if I go for a period of time when I do not see them, I miss them and talk to them as often as possible.
As many of you know my mother went through and is now in remission from cancer and has been free and clear of all cancer now for 3 years, thankfully and fingers crossed she will stay this way. Mom and I are and have always been very close and I can not imagine my life without her in it. She is and will always be my best friend no matter what happens or what we go through or how long we go without seeing each other. I love my mommy.
My father and I, although we have had a tough time of it at some points in my life, and he did not deal too well with the whole me being gay for the first few years, we have grown closer and are getting along quite well and it is nice to have them both in my life at this time. My father has been going through kidney dialysis now for two years and we almost lost him on New Years of 2012 which I am so thankful that we didn't. I can not imagine life without both my parents for me and also for them. The have been married for 52 years this year and not many people can say that!
Anyhow just thought I should say I love my mom and dad and to all those who have lost your parents, I feel for you and can not imagine what it is like not to be able to call and talk to them when you want to.
Friday, February 28, 2014
Seriously
This winter has been hell and I mean this in every way, the never ending snow and cold and ice, has been trying on my body and mind and I am just seriously tired of this shit.
It needs to end and it needed to ended a week ago. We are now at the last day of February and Toronto is under an extreme cold alert, WTF?
It is just hard to get out of bed and want to do anything this year and I have really been suffering for the first time in my life of depression due to this damn weather and long and overdrawn winter. With this winter we had ice storms, snow storms, extreme cold weather and power outages, it has sucked in every way possible and really put me in a sour mood.
I can honestly say I am not a happy camper and can not wait for spring, it has even been too cold to go downtown for the most part. We have not even seen Wayne since we got back from Cuba, weird! The cold and snow have kept all in doors and barely even see the neighbors or anyone out at all. Really sucks.
My body is just no longer suited for these long winters and horribly cold days, yes as a skinny white boy I do not do well in the cold at all, you may consider this whining, I will call it venting for the time being.
All I can say is bring on spring so I can get to work on our yard and get the garden turned and get shit done. been drawing up plans for the back flower beds and things that we can do out front and make things beautiful, we have also discussed putting up our fence and which type we are looking at. Will be so nice to have privacy in our back yard and a gate across the front to stop unwanted visitors. yes I said it, sometimes we just want to sit and relax in our yard by ourselves without someone walking down the drive to bug for something or another.
On the bright side of this winter the main floor is finally complete and done, all that is left in the house is to fix up the paint on the ceiling upstairs and stain and varnish the stairs, I can't wait to get all this done and then we can just enjoy it for a while and love what we have completed and done on our own. We now have a beautiful home and a great life in our little house.
Things have come together quite nice and I have to say we did an amazing fucking job here and are very proud of ourselves, yes that was a pat on the back, because sometimes you just have to pat yourself on the back and say a job well done.
Time to get sett for party season, and by this I mean almost 2 years in our house and party coming up soon, Need to have that long overdue housewarming party that we have never had. Ya bitches we are going to get down and have some fun this spring, summer and fall, hope you all are as well.
Anyways back to the cold and out for a smoke now. Got to love standing outside in minus 25 weather and smoking a great Cuban cigarette.
Have a great weekend and here is hoping that March will come in like a Lion and go out like a Lamb and do it quietly and quickly, the sooner we get some plus temperatures the happier we will all be.
It needs to end and it needed to ended a week ago. We are now at the last day of February and Toronto is under an extreme cold alert, WTF?
It is just hard to get out of bed and want to do anything this year and I have really been suffering for the first time in my life of depression due to this damn weather and long and overdrawn winter. With this winter we had ice storms, snow storms, extreme cold weather and power outages, it has sucked in every way possible and really put me in a sour mood.
I can honestly say I am not a happy camper and can not wait for spring, it has even been too cold to go downtown for the most part. We have not even seen Wayne since we got back from Cuba, weird! The cold and snow have kept all in doors and barely even see the neighbors or anyone out at all. Really sucks.
My body is just no longer suited for these long winters and horribly cold days, yes as a skinny white boy I do not do well in the cold at all, you may consider this whining, I will call it venting for the time being.
All I can say is bring on spring so I can get to work on our yard and get the garden turned and get shit done. been drawing up plans for the back flower beds and things that we can do out front and make things beautiful, we have also discussed putting up our fence and which type we are looking at. Will be so nice to have privacy in our back yard and a gate across the front to stop unwanted visitors. yes I said it, sometimes we just want to sit and relax in our yard by ourselves without someone walking down the drive to bug for something or another.
On the bright side of this winter the main floor is finally complete and done, all that is left in the house is to fix up the paint on the ceiling upstairs and stain and varnish the stairs, I can't wait to get all this done and then we can just enjoy it for a while and love what we have completed and done on our own. We now have a beautiful home and a great life in our little house.
Things have come together quite nice and I have to say we did an amazing fucking job here and are very proud of ourselves, yes that was a pat on the back, because sometimes you just have to pat yourself on the back and say a job well done.
Time to get sett for party season, and by this I mean almost 2 years in our house and party coming up soon, Need to have that long overdue housewarming party that we have never had. Ya bitches we are going to get down and have some fun this spring, summer and fall, hope you all are as well.
Anyways back to the cold and out for a smoke now. Got to love standing outside in minus 25 weather and smoking a great Cuban cigarette.
Have a great weekend and here is hoping that March will come in like a Lion and go out like a Lamb and do it quietly and quickly, the sooner we get some plus temperatures the happier we will all be.
Sunday, February 9, 2014
Ouch
Well it has been a week and that is about all, this winter is really getting to me and the snow and cold is just depressing after a little while. Since we arrived back from Cuba, we have had nothing but snow and cold here in Toronto.
I slipped down a couple stairs in the house the other morning when I got up and my hip is now really sore. I am not sure what I did, but this is hell.
I also slipped the other day on the bus on my way to a job interview, yes I finally got an interview after all this time, I actually think it went very well, though you never know. I am also going to be starting my own business soon and if I get this job I will have to figure out how to balance the both of them and get my shit together quickly.
Matt and I are doing good and the house is really almost done, what a feeling, we had someone in the other day to check out replacing clay pipe in the basement and when we do this we want to also consider taking the depth of the basement down another foot so we have a good enough height to finish the basement and add another bedroom down there.
I have been layed up on the couch now for 2 days and walking is really hard, I hate this pain and not being able to do anything is a real pain in the ass for me. I need to be on the go and doing stuff all the time.
So I am hoping that I can get back in my feet soon and this is a litteral statement as I am so sore and even had a hard time sleeping last night and have actually had a hard time sleeping the last week, it has really hit me this winter and the only redeeming factor is the sun that is still out every day. At least we have that here, which is better than anywhere else I have ever lived.
I miss Cuba and being on a holiday and carefree, It was so nice to just sit on the beach or poolside and I can see myself doing this all the time and going to Barbados, Cuba and Mexico when we can afford to do so. I just loved it!
Speaking of Cuba, Mara and Jeff have jetted off there for the week, seems to be the holiday choice of our neighborhood, I think a great many of us have all gone down there this year to escape the winter we have had.
Well it time for me to go and sit on the stairs and try to get some painting done, then maybe tomorrow I will go through some clothes again and get that done as well as I am hoping I got my job and will be going to work this week .
Anyways I hope you all had a great weekend and I will see you again soon, I know my writing today was very scattered and all over the place but I just write as it comes out. That is all!
I slipped down a couple stairs in the house the other morning when I got up and my hip is now really sore. I am not sure what I did, but this is hell.
I also slipped the other day on the bus on my way to a job interview, yes I finally got an interview after all this time, I actually think it went very well, though you never know. I am also going to be starting my own business soon and if I get this job I will have to figure out how to balance the both of them and get my shit together quickly.
Matt and I are doing good and the house is really almost done, what a feeling, we had someone in the other day to check out replacing clay pipe in the basement and when we do this we want to also consider taking the depth of the basement down another foot so we have a good enough height to finish the basement and add another bedroom down there.
I have been layed up on the couch now for 2 days and walking is really hard, I hate this pain and not being able to do anything is a real pain in the ass for me. I need to be on the go and doing stuff all the time.
So I am hoping that I can get back in my feet soon and this is a litteral statement as I am so sore and even had a hard time sleeping last night and have actually had a hard time sleeping the last week, it has really hit me this winter and the only redeeming factor is the sun that is still out every day. At least we have that here, which is better than anywhere else I have ever lived.
I miss Cuba and being on a holiday and carefree, It was so nice to just sit on the beach or poolside and I can see myself doing this all the time and going to Barbados, Cuba and Mexico when we can afford to do so. I just loved it!
Speaking of Cuba, Mara and Jeff have jetted off there for the week, seems to be the holiday choice of our neighborhood, I think a great many of us have all gone down there this year to escape the winter we have had.
Well it time for me to go and sit on the stairs and try to get some painting done, then maybe tomorrow I will go through some clothes again and get that done as well as I am hoping I got my job and will be going to work this week .
Anyways I hope you all had a great weekend and I will see you again soon, I know my writing today was very scattered and all over the place but I just write as it comes out. That is all!
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Almost done our little house
Well folks the time is nearing and we are almost done our renovations, since we arrived back home we have sanded the dry wall in the back porch, painted back there, started the railing and hung up and organized what needed to be done.
I have finished the treatment in the bathroom up stairs and we have cleaned the house from top to bottom, scrubbing all ornaments, cleaning every service in the house, washing all the windows and pictures and only a few things left to do.
Have to stain the stair treads, base boards, and window trim and door trim in the back porch. touch up some of the paint in the house and then we are done and all complete.
After all is done it will have been close to two years since we bought the house , moved in and gutted and started working on things here. And it has all been worth it in so many ways, now it is time to get back to reality, but not until after we have one kick ass huge house warming party to celebrate our achievements here and enjoy our work.
Next summer we want to put up a fence around the back yard and get things done back there, do a draped patio and have a look at the basement to see what can be done down there.
We love our home and plan to be here a while, well that is unless someone comes by and offers us a price in which we just can't refuse, then we might have to consider selling and moving to a new project but not yet.
So not a whole lot else to report today, wishing you all a great February and a lovely week, thanks for reading and talk to you soon.
I have finished the treatment in the bathroom up stairs and we have cleaned the house from top to bottom, scrubbing all ornaments, cleaning every service in the house, washing all the windows and pictures and only a few things left to do.
Have to stain the stair treads, base boards, and window trim and door trim in the back porch. touch up some of the paint in the house and then we are done and all complete.
After all is done it will have been close to two years since we bought the house , moved in and gutted and started working on things here. And it has all been worth it in so many ways, now it is time to get back to reality, but not until after we have one kick ass huge house warming party to celebrate our achievements here and enjoy our work.
Next summer we want to put up a fence around the back yard and get things done back there, do a draped patio and have a look at the basement to see what can be done down there.
We love our home and plan to be here a while, well that is unless someone comes by and offers us a price in which we just can't refuse, then we might have to consider selling and moving to a new project but not yet.
So not a whole lot else to report today, wishing you all a great February and a lovely week, thanks for reading and talk to you soon.
Our Holiday
Well we finally did it and took a holiday for the first time in our marriage and life together. Matt and I went to Cuba for 7 days on January 9th and I have to say I have been chomping at the bit to go back since we got home. it was so amazing!
To be honest when we were talking about a holiday, Cuba was the furthest from my desired location to go and visit, but I am sure glad I got over that and took the plunge and went because I don't think it would have been as great anywhere else in the world.
We stayed just out side of Havana Cuba in this quaint and older apartment style hotel, with a large pick of restaurants and few bars right at the resort, all was good, and you cross the road to be on the beach and a swim in the ocean. If we didn't feel like going to the ocean we got to sit poolside, pick up a litre of vodka for $4 and drink all day out of it. Great, then a short stumble for lunch and grab a large pizza for $3, what a great life, and the real bonus for me was I could smoke anywhere and everywhere I wanted to , no freezing your ass off outside.
And the people down there are all so friendly and hard working, a totally different outlook on life than we as Canadians have.
We also met many great people within the resort from different areas of Canada and had a great time with all of them as well, but I have to say my two favorites were Michel and Richard from Sherbrook Quebec, a couple of amazing and fun loving guys, was so nice to hang out with them and visit and just have a great time.
We also met a couple from Windsor who were just a blast, Veronica and Gunther and his very sweet mother, Matt went to an authentic Cuban dance and show with them one night in Havana.
Our favorite waitress there was named Julie and she was just fabulous and an amazing young woman, and so beautiful and sweet, I cant imagine anyone in the world not liking her. Then are favorite bartender was Danier, sweet and also a real looker and just a charmer in every way. For the most part all the staff were amazing and we just had a great time.
We were inspired to go by the price we got, we were wanting to stay for the beauty and the fabulous views, people and food, and ocean and pools.
I check online everyday to see if there is another special and we can go back, I would totally honestly move there if we could, I just loved it.
We have decided to make this a yearly trip and will try to plan it with Michel and Richard and hopefully can drag Jeff and Mara with us next year and have one hell of a party in Cuba with all of our friends, old and new.
So my advice to you now that we have been to Havana, is go and if you do, stay for 2 weeks not one, because it will leave you wanting more. Enjoy and thanks for reading.
To be honest when we were talking about a holiday, Cuba was the furthest from my desired location to go and visit, but I am sure glad I got over that and took the plunge and went because I don't think it would have been as great anywhere else in the world.
We stayed just out side of Havana Cuba in this quaint and older apartment style hotel, with a large pick of restaurants and few bars right at the resort, all was good, and you cross the road to be on the beach and a swim in the ocean. If we didn't feel like going to the ocean we got to sit poolside, pick up a litre of vodka for $4 and drink all day out of it. Great, then a short stumble for lunch and grab a large pizza for $3, what a great life, and the real bonus for me was I could smoke anywhere and everywhere I wanted to , no freezing your ass off outside.
And the people down there are all so friendly and hard working, a totally different outlook on life than we as Canadians have.
We also met many great people within the resort from different areas of Canada and had a great time with all of them as well, but I have to say my two favorites were Michel and Richard from Sherbrook Quebec, a couple of amazing and fun loving guys, was so nice to hang out with them and visit and just have a great time.
We also met a couple from Windsor who were just a blast, Veronica and Gunther and his very sweet mother, Matt went to an authentic Cuban dance and show with them one night in Havana.
Our favorite waitress there was named Julie and she was just fabulous and an amazing young woman, and so beautiful and sweet, I cant imagine anyone in the world not liking her. Then are favorite bartender was Danier, sweet and also a real looker and just a charmer in every way. For the most part all the staff were amazing and we just had a great time.
We were inspired to go by the price we got, we were wanting to stay for the beauty and the fabulous views, people and food, and ocean and pools.
I check online everyday to see if there is another special and we can go back, I would totally honestly move there if we could, I just loved it.
We have decided to make this a yearly trip and will try to plan it with Michel and Richard and hopefully can drag Jeff and Mara with us next year and have one hell of a party in Cuba with all of our friends, old and new.
So my advice to you now that we have been to Havana, is go and if you do, stay for 2 weeks not one, because it will leave you wanting more. Enjoy and thanks for reading.
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