Stat for you all

1 of every 20 people born is gay. That means 1 of every 20 people is instantly put down, given bad labels, left alone, put in minority, and so much more, just because of who they are. Many gay teens are turning to suicide as a way of escaping. If you want to tell them to hold their heads high, and that you respect them for who they are.

 This is just a small stat for you all and just to let you all know, this is what I went through most days while growing up and still go through a lot of prejudices now, though I have learned that it does not always matter what the world thinks of me and my lifestyle, but if I have friends and family that stand beside me then I will be fine and I can hold my head up and be who I am always. What others think and how they judge me and other gays is unfair but I guess we all discrimanate in some ways at some point in our lives.

 I am true to myself in every way and am who I am not only by my creation but by the way I was raised and what life has dealt me along the way. 

Tuesday is here again

Well it is Tuesday and it is time to go back to work and do some stuff in the house. Yes we took the weekend off , but not to sit around and drink and get drunk all weekend , but to relax and visit with friends and just enjoy ourselves for a change. It has been so long since we took some time for us and a break from doing the renovations around here, it was a nice change and a good break. We got to hook up with Wayne Howell and see him and go out and ran into Davinci and then on the weekend we got to go and see Cory Hart, who hasn't done a concert in over 10 years and the best part was it was all for free.
We also got to spend sometime with Nancy and Ann and meet the new little puppy Ann got, so damn cute. And of course we got to see Wayne who I must say happy birthday today.
The dogs and cats here are very happy to have their bed set back up in our spare room. Rogue crawls into bed there every night and goes to sleep. She loves having the double bed, Storm and Nadia usually go up and join her for a great nights sleep, Sparky on the other hand just lies down here and sleeps on one of the blue storage bins here in the living room.
All and all life is good and things go on everyday and Matt and I are all the family we truly need, with our lovely animals and a few great friends to surround us. Friends make better family than family does. This month is going to be another stressful one with renos until we are done the kitchen and the bathroom completely, I feel that after these two rooms are completed every other room will seem to be so damn easy. Looking forward to it.
Anyways not too much to report today, going to get to work now after a cigarette and coffee outside with the dogs and check on the garden. Have a great day and talk to you all soon.

Another Weekend Gone

Well the long weekend is gone and here we sit, looks like it will be a half sleepless night.I have done what I felt to be right and am distancing myself from all family at this point and time in my life. You can blame this on who ever you want to say what ever you like but in the end this is my choice and something I need to do for me. I have never been extremely close to any of my remaining family members and thus by doing this now I am free to be who i want to be without any explanation to any one. I still love my family and will always do so.
Anyhow no more family talk at all.
Our weekend here was lovely and we had a great Pride and a lot of fun and managed to do this on our own terms and our own things. Nice how it happens that way at a certain point in your life. We did not go to the Pride parade but did sit at home yesterday and have a lovely quiet gay day of our own. We went out last night and sat out front the house and watched the fireworks here in Toronto from the front street.
Today we stayed at home as well and just talked and watched movies, it is great to be over 40, gay and married and living in Toronto. We love it.
\Tonight to close off the long weekend we sat and visited with Jeff and Mara for a bit and talked about different things going on in our lives. Nice to have good friends who are so close in the neighborhood. Anyhow I hope you all had a great weekend and a lovely Pride and Canada Day. Tootles for now.

Family Not required nor desired

To my family or lack there of, I do not need you and you are not required to be a part of my life. I unlike others members of family can not afford to buy you what ever you want and do not care if you like me, want me in your life or anything else. To all of you who do not like me or want me around, this is fine, there will be no more posts about family ever again. This is my life and most of you are no longer ever welcome in any way shape or form, Please leave me alone.
Dear Adrienne, James, Michelle, Jay , Charlene, Kory, Darren, and anyone else. I do not require nor desire to associate with any of you at any point.
Understand this to all of you, we do not get to choose our family unfortunately and even if we did, I would have not chosen any of you.
My blog is of my personal life and freedom of speech is just that, I write the truth , not like any of you have ever even spoken it and to Doris AKA Adrienne, Good luck.
I must now get on with my life, so please fuck off if you do not like me or what I write. Thank You

More Renovations

Matt and I have been working hard on the house and decided to take the last 4 days off as we have not had a day off from renovations in the last few weeks. We have done so much and been so busy with work on the house, we have done drywall in the last few weeks, new plumbing for the new bathroom and tiled the new bathroom and put in the fixtures. I have planted the garden and everything is coming up fairly well, in another few weeks we will have some fresh vegetables. Will be so nice to have beans and tomatoes and everything from the garden that we grew ourselves.
Last week we got the oil tank out and Marc cut it in half for us, then our garbage guy Richard came by and picked up all of our scrap metal for us again. He has become our regular garbage guy and comes by for a pickup every couple weeks and charges us a great rate for this.
This week we have a lot to do as well, we are going to finish drywall and I am going to run some electrical for the bathroom and kitchen, sand the old staircase down and then sand the living room and dining room, get up the rest of the drywall in the dining room and hopefully finish dry walling the ceilings. So much to do! I am also learning to mud and tape drywall, I get better with every room I think.
Matt is going to finish tiling the bathroom this week and then tear out the old washroom. The we can take down the wall in the back room and finish our spare room as much as possible for now. We made an access panel to our attic last week and now I can get up there to run a light for the bedrooms and put the fan in the bathroom.
Did some gardening today and am relaxing a bit as am a bit sore from last week and lifting drywall above my head for hours, things are great here. I look forward to your comments and please when you leave them, don`t do it anonymous. Talk to you all soon, have a great week from your gaybors.

Do things ever get easier

I am not sure if things ever get easier or if they just get different every day. Since Brad passed away, life has gotten very hard and very different every day. I have now been cut off by most of my family and think of this every day. Some I have cut out of my life and others have cut me out of theirs, either way it is done and I am going to have to learn to live with that for now. I am never sure whether or not it is right to just be done with people, though I should really learn to just trust my own instinct and go with it. This is what I am doing now. My sister Charlene, other wise known as the crack whore to me, has probably been the most hurtful in my life over the last 10 years. I tried to forgive her and get over the way I felt about her, my mistake. Never go back, just go forward and if you feel you need to be done with anyone in your life , no matter how much it hurts, just do it. I have done this with my Aunt Hazel, nephews Darren, Ryan, Shane and Kory now, My brother James and his wife Adrienne are also done with me and never welcome back in my life. My parents have decided to cut me out of theirs and choose Kory and Charlene over me, after all I have done, and as for james and his wife and kids, this was just time and meant to be.
It may seem harsh to people to know that I am now like this , but in order for me to live a happy and great life with my husband Matthew, I need to do this without the poisonous and venomous involvement of my family. The only family I now have anything to do with is Cheryl and Lorne and her grand daughters and Son David and daughter Michelle, My sister in law Patti who has been more of a sister to me over the last 20 something years than you can ever imagine. Also her 2 fabulous girls Alicia and Amanda. I also speak with my cousin Harold and his wife Roseanne. I have learned that family is not always who you share a bloodline with , but who is accepting of you and loves you for the true you with all their heart.
I have also learned that to have a healthy free life , I need to let go! As Matt is always telling me , let go, let god. Maybe someday I will.
I will always have to wonder if Brad were still here , would life be different, would the family get along and would we all be closer to each other, I honestly think not, no matter how much he would have loved that and always wanted that. After all look at the family we are speaking of , mine!
I have always and will always loved my family, but I can honestly say I really do not like them at all. Some are so phony, like Adrienne who is now trying to buy forgiveness after all that is what her and James do is buy their ways into your life. Not my style. They can say what ever the hell they want to about me, but I can honestly say this I am happier without all of them and just glad that I have decided to cut them out of my life. As I tell Matt all the time I am what I am and what I am needs no excuses, yes this is from a song, but seems to work pretty damn well for my life.

Also some of my old friends from the past are now also gone out my life, this is so weird and I am feel like life has changed so much in the last month, I am just waiting for a bit of normality, though I am not sure what normal is any more for me. I have to now figure it out and get it back for myself.
As for the family thing I am just tired of not being respected. I need not to mention anything more about old friends who I thought were friends or of family who is related but not required.

Have a great weekend and please remember we choose our friends so choose carefully and make sure they choose you back, unfortunately we do not get the same choice with family.

Pride Weekend and Canada Day

We had a great weekend thus far and very little drama, Matt and I have had a great time and went out starting on Thursday with Wayne and Wayne. So Thursday was the start of our Pride and this is what happened to us that entire day. Matthew and I went downtown around 8pm and met Wayne for dinner at one of our favorite burger places Acme Burger on Church and after dinner the three of us met up with the other Wayne and went back to his place and drank Cosmos all night which was a great time for us. Marc texts us and lets us know he is back from Niagra Falls and has forgotten his key in the house and is locked out. An honest mistake that can happen to anyone! Matt told him to come downtown and get his key and get it cut. Marc came downtown and came to Waynes' apartment and started with his drama, picked up Matts key and stormed off like a 10 year old child. He said he was going to get it cut and tried he said, next thing we know he texts Matt again and said he is going home as he needs to charge his phone and have a nap. So now Matt has no key to our own house at this point, Texts back and forth from Marc to both of us. Next thing we know a couple hours later Marc shows back up to Waynes and slams the keys on the table and says to Matt I do not want to ruin your weekend, really, that is all I can honestly say. Anyways he then meets Wayne and I out at the elevator is is just rude to both of us as well. Well Marc you complained I did not treat your little friend you had over for dinner what you called appropriate in my own house, think about the way you treat people, like our neighbors who were over for drinks, my friend Wayne who was over for dinner and my other friend Wayne in his own home. If you are reading this Marc, 1 thing to say to you, get your head out of your ass and act your age, you are a 50 something year old man and you date people so much younger and go to circuit parties. Quit treating people like you are the only man on the planet, you are not!
Anyways that was Thursday and now Marc is gone to where ever else he can stay, I do want to thank Marc for his help, and just so you know it was muchly appreciated, your actions on Thursday however were not.
We left Waynes a little after 12 and went to the new bar Church on Church, use to be George Play. It was a good time and we got to see DJ Davinci. 
Friday night Matt and I stayed home and Mara came over and brought us some beautiful Pride decorated cupcakes she had made us, so sweet and wonderful. Matt ate most of them and we had a nice quiet night. Last night we went down to Church Street again and met up with Wayne and watched the free Cory Hart concert , it was amazing and so great and just plain fun damn it. We then met up with Ann and Nancy and went for a walk up and down Church street and then back to Waynes for a drink. It was such a nice night. Then we got home and went over and had a couple drinks with Jeff and Mara. Love going over there and visiting, we actually have a lot in common with them and enjoy their company.
Today for Canada Day and Pride we are going to go down to the Pride Parader and then probably walk around and have a few drinks again, this is what Pride is for, fun for us together as a couple, I have to say this is the best Pride ever for Matt and I, we have had so much fun and Toronto has been perfect for us as a couple.
Well Happy Pride to you all and I hope you have an Amazing Canada Day.