Okay here it is, I have been super depressed lately and not sure whether I was coming or going. So ass of today I am going to get my shit back together and get back on track. I have started working out again and I try to work out for at least 30 to 45 minutes and use to on a daily basis, not sure what happened to that. Anyhow I am going to make myself do it again. I also have to get up and just do what I am going to do. I realize I really need to stay busy and keep my mind busy all the time. This will help me to think more positive and hopefully land a job. Step number 3 to getting back on track is my new goal to quit smoking, this I promised myself I would do if mom's news was good last week and it was. I have been without a cigarette now for just over 6 hours and will do this, this time no matter how hard it is.
Wish me luck!
So on that note now all I have to do is to get a job as I have realized that working is a huge part of me and a huge part of my life and a part that makes me happy and keeps me stable in every way. I haven't worked in so long I think it is just finally driven me nuts. I said for the last year that I just wasn't meant to get a job so I could be there for Mom if needed and I thought that was true. Now I am just not sure if I can get a job with the competition I have in this city, but I am determined and will get the job and not only a job , but one that I actually want to have. Not those shit jobs I have taken here in the past for those shit employers who wanted to use me like a god damn slave or something. Sorry I don't work for peanuts!
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